Primed For Extinction Part 1
by dougaude
Summary: Watch as Maya and Zero deal with the fallout with the final fight with the Warrior and Jack. Many of their friends and allies have either been imprisoned indenfinitely or are dead. (MayaxZero but geared more towards mutual support and friendship, slight AU each part will be 1 of the 4 main DLCs with two Vault Hunters, chapters will be all missions I can complete)
1. Chapter 1: Welcome to Oasis

**Chapter 1: Welcome to Oasis**

**Mission(s): A Warm Welcome * Main Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlet and her Pirate's Booty**

"Looks like we made it, ready?" Maya said, and Zero nodded. They had appeared at the top of a cliff hemmed in by walls of misshapen rock that curved near the top to form ominous overhangs. As Zero checked both their packs and provisions Maya checked their surroundings.

The Fast Travel station they digistructed from sits on a platform made of makeshift metal plates held up by metal beams and cross beams. _Scooter must have been here some time in his life_, Maya thinks since she looked to the right and up a small hill seeing a catch-a-ride station. Looking beyond their immediate area Maya saw, almost directly in front of them a hole in the rock; through that Maya sees a freestanding rocky platform atop a pillar and atop the platform is a lighthouse.

"We ready to go?" Maya asks.

Zero nods his head and then speaks, "we have now made it / it is time for adventure / go down the tunnel."

Zero handed Maya her bag which she slung over her back … they didn't usually carry the bulky packs, but their usual packs only held weapons money and the likes of that. The heavy backpacks were of similar tech but they held supplies and food … as well as a limited but ample supply of water. As they walked towards the tunnel Zero pointed to a sign they hadn't noticed before, it was covered in a grimy layer of dust and read "Welcome to Oasis."

"Well now we know what the town is called." Maya's next sentence was cut short when someone came over the ECHO system.

"Welcome to my lovely town of Oasis stranger! Now, if you could please SAVE ME FROM THE FILTHY SAND PIRATES TRYING TO STEAL MY WATER!"

Both Maya and Zero looked at each other, they nodded and then rushed down the tunnel and when it ended, they almost stopped in their tracks. The paved road led to the most ramshackle yet still intact desert town they had ever seen. The town had three collections of buildings: at the roads end several shells of broken cars lay scattered. Hanging over the mini junkyard hangs a large paper sign suspended from two buildings flanking the entrance to the town; it reads "Pier fest come and get your feet wet". In the distance and high above looms the very large form of a ship, tethered to the ground from its anchor points by to very large chains.

As they get closer Zero pulls out his Jacobs sniper rifle. Maya pulls out an incendiary shotgun, both of them move forward. Zero hangs back next to a neon sign proclaiming what the dusty sign did, it sat on a small pile of rocks on the left side of the road, and about 10 feet back from the entrance to the town.

The first pirates emerge when Maya is camped behind a broken car shell. Zero quickly realizes his disadvantage when a manic pirate carrying two flaming grog bottles rushes at his hiding place. Making a quick decision, Zero strafes across the road and using no scope pops the grogmaster in the head.

Maya meanwhile gets up close and personal with some of the gruffer sand pirates, she even melees one back into 4 more of his fellow pirates. Maya then throws a grenade, and jumps behind cover of a building. The explosion detonates, and the storm front grenade pulls the remaining sand pirates in. Electricity shocks them all, but their shields are holding.

Suddenly a sniper rifle barrel flashes come from the rooftops of the building cluster across form Maya. One by one the pirates are taken out by head shots, their shields being weakened by Maya's storm front grenade. Once the last pirate was eliminated another voice comes on the ECHO.

"He Shade, give us some water and Sandman won't use your rib cage like a hat rack."

_This guy sounds like trouble better take care of him quick_, Maya thinks. She walks forward and once coming upon a dry cracked fountain in the middle of the town's center a pirate captain popes up from hiding. He has no beard and Maya calls him No-Beard.

Maya blasts with her shotgun, but the guy's meaty and he barely feels the shots. And due to No-Beard's naturally damage resistant nature he ignores the pain and charges Maya. In desperation she stumbles back, as he's about to blast Maya's head in with a corrosive rocket she remembers her powers at the last minute.

Just as No-Beard is caught up in a bubble of energy, a sniper bolt explodes with a lot of force through No-Beard's brain. Maya breathes a sigh of relief, she looks to her right and sees Zero giving the thumbs up, his other hand cradling his sniper rifle. She motions for him to join her, and as he does Shade comes on the ECHO.

"Thank you so very much, my friend! YesYesYesYes! Now that my water is safe – let us chat in person! Like people."

Another voice comes on the ECHO. "What's that ruckus coming from Oasis? Oh – is that a Vault Hunter I see? I'm Captain Scarlett, and something tells me you're here for the treasure same as I am. So we've got two options: we can work together and split the treasure, or we could just try and kill on another. Or maybe both! Come find me in Wurmwater ya?"

Zero comes up from behind her a, '?', appearing before his helmet hovering.

Maya shrugs her shoulders and says, "Yeah were we coming her for the treasure? Maybe but I didn't realize there was someone else looking for it."

After these words both of them head over to a shack with a sign of a cat above it, below that cat is a smaller one playing with the larger cat's nipples. Below the neon lit cats are the words, "Kitty Kream".

Maya and Zero reach it and a panel opens below the sign revealing Shade, "I am Shade and you – YOU are the coolest people I have ever seen. Please don't go. Please?"

Zero taps Maya's shoulder and points to a weapons machine to the left of the shack, Maya nods and walks up to shade.

"The town's people of Oasis thank you. I enjoy spending this quality time with you. Please don't leave I'm lonely. Are we doing a staring contest? I will win. I am super-good at staring."

Maya's eyes widen slightly and she says, "Payment for saving your town?"

Shade just nods and hands her the money.


	2. Chapter 2: A Sandskiff and Nechrophilia

**Chapter 2: A Sandskiff and Necrophilia**

**Mission(s): My Life For A Sandskiff * Main**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Shade adjusts his hat then says, "If you are looking for the treasure of the sands you want to talk to Captain Scarlet. She's set up in Wurmwater – you'll need a Sandskiff to reach her. Use mine – it's the least I can do for the stranger who saved the many living people of my town. Oh you're so cool."

After getting directions to where the Sandskiff was the two Vault Hunters walked away. Maya and Zero walk down the boardwalk to the left of the Kitty Kream shack a ways to the catch-a-ride station. To the right of the catch-a-ride are two stripped frames for hangers with a metal sheets above to provide shade, inside them are two delivery pads and the rest of the gear Scooter uses. In one of them sits a Sandskiff. Maya and Zero approach the Sandskiff, both of them agreeing to get inside.

"Wait a minute," Maya says, "Zero?"

'?' Zero's helmet displayed a red question mark, letting Maya know that he was listening.

"Did that Shade guy just say the many … living people of his town? Not that I won't mind doing jobs for him, it's just that I think he's somewhat of a liar," Maya's words made Zero stop for a minute and consider, however they had a job to do and both of them climbed on the Sandskiff. Maya took the wheel, and Zero set himself up in front of Maya on the bulk of the vehicle.

Suddenly there was a rusty sounding engine noise, and then an explosion.

"Oh no, did my Sandskiff just randomly explode, forcing you to stay in Oasis and hang out with me some more? Darn. Well, my other friends out in the flats might have some Sandskiff parts for you. They are very nice and alive go talk to them. But be careful – if you step on the flat sands out there the sand grubs will hear you then eat you then you won't be able to hang out with me," Shade's voice informed them over the ECHO.

Maya and Zero look at each other – both thinking the same thing – Shade's crazy, and after brushing some soot off their clothes they walk back along the boardwalk towards Shade's friends. When they reach the town square Zero points down a dock walkway saying that the furthest one away is over there. The get to the end of the dock and jump down to Lionel's precipice, unsure on how to talk to him Maya pokes his shoulder.

"Why hello person! I am feeling very good today and not dead from thirst. How are you?"

"Ah you've met Lionel! How are you Lionel?" Shade asked.

"Not dead of thirst, ha hahah!"

"Tell me about it. How is your family?"

"Well they – {end of tape}" The female robot voice of the infamous tape recorder cut Lionel off, and both Zero and Maya looked at each other in horror. _This Shade person is … crazy and a necrophiliac, _Maya thought, _but I don't really care so long as he gives us stuff to keep both our minds busy._

"That is a great story Lionel. Friend I believe he has an engine capacitor stashed somewhere nearby! It's yours!" Shade says.

After looking around for an engine capacitor Maya gets frustrated and almost walks back to a ladder to get on top of the dock. But Zero spots it at the end of the fishing pole Lionel is holding, both of them again jump down. A giant sand worm jumps from the ground and swallows the engine capacitor it burrows away beyond a disused anchor sticking out of the ground. After dealing with a sand grub, Maya and Zero chases after it.

The rather large worm presented a challenge since it kept upchucking a bunch of tiny grubs. Maya took care of those with shots from her shock Malawian pistol, and Zero whittled down the giant sand worm's health with his Jacobs pistol. Eventually once most of the worm's tough skin had been worn away, Zero switched to his sniper and blew the worm's big brains out.

Maya walked forward and grabbed the engine capacitor, after securing it on Zero's pack – since he didn't pack that much in the first place – Maya and Zero heard Shade say something once more.

"Only a few more Sandskiff parts and you'll be on your way to Captain Scarlett and the lost treasure! How fun that you'll be leaving me alone."

After dealing with the Sand Worm Queen, Maya and Zero trudge back across the sand flats. Once traveling up a slope and through the disused hanger they arrive back on the boardwalk. Once they reach the intersection they head right behind the fountain to Mrs. Blavis – which incidentally is another one of Shade's corpses made to look human again.

As soon as Maya and Zero near it, another tape recorder spews a prerecorded voice out of a speaker, "Oh my word! A new person has left Oasis to talk to me! And this person is so handsome too!"

Maya looks at Zero confused, she whispers, "Does she mean me?"

Shade comes on and says, "Uh, that is Missus Blavis – be careful she is a relentless flirt. I always feel like a piece of meat around her. I gave her a coolant disperser a few weeks ago as a gift take it!

Mrs. Blavis gives a few last words, "Could I please be getting some fries with that shake? You are so attractive!"

After talking to Mrs. Blavis Maya looks to her right ad sees what they're looking for inside an old car husk. After grabbing that both of them head towards the bounty board, which sits going beyond a car husk, and to the left of the fountain from their current position. There pinned and held up by a couple of stakes in the ground is another corpse.

"Well a-hey how're you doing? They call me Jocko the joker; I'm a laugh a minute. Hey what's the difference between a skag and a lack of water? There isn't one because they'll both kill you."

"Ahahahaha! Oh, he is a cut up! Oh gosh, Jocko! Jocko borrowed one of my pressure regulators for one of his comedy bits the other day! Find it and it is yours!" Shade said.

Zero sees it and tells Maya that he'll get it; once he climbs back up the way he had been during the fight Zero makes his way easily to it. While Zero is descending the buildings form his escapade Maya walks over to the final thrust up corpse, this time she's propped up and tied on a mattress.

"Hi there dude! I'm Jennifer! Clothes and boys and high school and gossip!"

Shad interjects, "That's Jennifer – a nice girl but very naïve. I think she has a magnetic over thruster you could use for the Sandskiff."

Maya looking around for a bit spies the object under the mattress, Zero joins her just as she pulls it out from under the mattress.

"You have everything you need to rebuild the Sandskiff! Just thank the lovely people of Oasis! It's good we have so much water – otherwise we might have died of dehydration. Please attach those parts you retrieved to the Sandskiff. Then you may scan it and summon it from any catch-a-ride machine!" Shade informs them.

Maya and Zero return to the old Sandskiff in one of the hangers, and attach the parts in the needed places.

"Oh she is fixed! Wonderful! Please hit that button to digiscan her into the catch-a-ride system, if you want," Shade says.

Maya hits the button and the node on the ceiling does the action of digistructing the Sandskiff into the system.

"There – you may now digistruct a Sandskiff from any catch-a-ride machine! Before you go off to meet Captain Scarlett you must return to me."

Maya and Zero return to Shade and turn in the mission, receiving their payment.

"I had no reason to call you back. I just enjoyed your presence."

Maya looks at Zero with a look on her face, Zero just shrugs. Both of them realize it's quite late now, and they find a suitable place to fall asleep. In one of the abandoned houses they find two fairly well maintained beds. Without taking off his armor, Zero plops down and presumably falls asleep. After a moment of looking at Zero – and sighing somewhat smitten by him – Maya does the same, but only after pulling her pack off her shoulders.


	3. Chapter 3: Keeping Company of Oasis

**Chapter 3: Keeping Company of Oasis**

**Mission(s): Fire Water * Side Mission**

** Giving Jocko A Leg Up * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlet and her Pirate's Booty**

Both Maya and Zero are back at Shade's shack, in response to Zero's insistence that they get to know him better. Maya refuses at first but agrees to talk to Shade.

"Have you met my friend Frank? He is a very gruff man and an alcoholic. Yes it is a tragedy. He becomes very irate if he is not given the finest whiskey. Could you please procure some from the merchant caravans nearby?" Shade says.

Starting from Shade's shack Maya and Zero go left to the catch-a-ride. They drive straight out, and going a distance they pass under a bride. Zero spies the whiskey they need on a freestanding rock island supported by a pillar of similar rock. The only visible way to the whiskey is by a bridge, they drive around the rocky monolith and up a slope turning right a little to a place called wurmtail plateau.

Maya jumps out and Zero speculates, "Perhaps I was wrong / maybe we shouldn't be here / we should face the truth."

Maya just shakes her head and takes out her trusty Heartbreaker shotgun. The incendiary gun is Maya's favorite when dealing with fleshy things. The camp is filled with pirates, and the attitude of many of them are that as an island nation.

After all the sand pirates living in wurmtail plateau are cut off from virtually everything else, since their camp is surrounded on all sides by the sand flats – which are notorious for containing many deadly sand worms grubs queens and the like. The sand pirates were easy enough, but when Maya started across the bride Zero sense something truly terrible about to happen.

There was a large house on the island, and out of the door came to pirates. Not only were they skeletons but they emanated an evil presence, the fear overcame Maya and she froze. Just a second later Maya screamed, "Toss me the plasma caster! Damnit now Zero, fire won't work against these guys!"

The reason Zero had been so hesitant in tossing Maya the weapon was because it was Hyperion, but when the two curse pirates rushed across the bridge to Maya Zero swiftly tossed the Corporate Plasma Caster to Maya's awaiting hands.

Using her skills with SMGs Maya almost literally poured acid on the cursed pirates, and in a matter of seconds their bones disintegrated. Once Maya grabs the whiskey – with Zero covering her back – Shade comes on the ECHO and says, "Oh thank god you got the whiskey. Frank was beginning to get violent. Please, return the drinks to him.

Maya and Zero go back through the pirate camp and raid it. For they knew it wouldn't stay entirely empty for long. They then went back to their Sandskiff.

"You have met Jocko, yes? He is a simple man, with very big dreams. He wishes to be a sand pirate you see. I'm sure he would love it if you could give him some pirate-y prosthetics. Teeth peg legs things of this sort."

Right after raiding the Fire Water sand pirate's camp and after both of them listen to Shade's words, Zero wants to kill more sand pirates. Maya likes the idea, and they agree to the next mission. After skiffing to the cove, Maya and Zero are forced to leave their Sandskiff behind. They proceed on foot, murdering the 15 or so sand pirates – while climbing through their camp constructed up a cliff side starting in a basin/cove – and collecting their prosthetics, which they stashed in their packs.

Shade says something that reminds Maya and Zero of what a necrophiliac he is, "Jocko do you see this? The kind treasure hunter is collecting pirate accessories so you may fulfill your life long fantasy of being a sand pirate, which was cut short thanks to a tragic childhood injury."

"Why did the skag cross the road? Because there was water on the other side. Of the rode. Ha Ha." Jocko says in response.

"He laughs to keep from crying. It is so very, very sad." Shade says.

After finishing up the pirates, and collecting the pirate accessories Maya and Zero stash the mission items in their Sandskiff.

Zero makes a comment that piques Maya's interest, "Since we're keeping this / Sandskiff we need a good name / and a new paint job."

"Oh that's fine, we can do that later," Maya says. "But first I think we should go help out that Aubrey Callahan girl, I saw her name on the battle board asking for help. Maybe not all Oasis's citizens are mutilate corpses."

They arrive back at the docking hangers, and since Zero told Maya he wanted some alone time to think, she does the courteous thing of turning in all the missions to shade they had completed thus far. Zero does say that he'll help Maya out with Aubrey Callahan.

Maya in good spirit turns in the mission with Jocko, in order to give Zero his needed time alone. Shade tells Maya, "Oh these pirate things are so wonderful Jocko will love them. Almost as much as he loves telling hilarious jokes, and not being dead of thirst."

Realizing that Zero needs more time then she thought, Maya reluctantly went to frank – she still thought the way Shade messed with the corpses was wrong, but money was money.

This one thankfully had been put under some shade, just so the sun wouldn't rot it as fast. "I am a tough man, who says tough things, in a grow-ly voice. I can – {tape corrupted}"

Maya laughed, even though she felt like she really shouldn't.

Shade says scolding, "You have a problem Frank! You're so drunk you're speaking the gibberish. Please return to me friend. I fear Frank is beyond help."

When returning to Shade, Maya sees Zero approaching her – now that he's back Maya feels more comfortable talking to Shade.

"Perhaps I should do a – what is the word – intervention."

**A/N: Hey there this is the first chapter in which I didn't do a Main Mission, do you like these better? Anyways, if I do a main mission I'll confine it to one chapter, Side Missions will always by multiple to one chapter. I'll try not to include a Side Mission with a Main Mission. Just thought I'd clarify.**


	4. Chapter 4: Introducing Aubrey Callahan

Chapter 4: Introducing Aubrey Callahan

**Mission(s): Burying the Past * Side Mission**

**Message In A Bottle * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Zero sat in his and Maya's Sandskiff, it became harder and harder for Zero to ignore Maya's stare – she was standing leaning up against the hanger wall, while Zero was sitting sideways in the driver's seat of the Sandskiff. Eventually he gave in and looked her way, she was holding up her ECHO device. "Hey Zero," Maya says, "you're gonna want to hear this."

Aubrey Callahan's voice entered Zero's suits sound receptors, "My great grandma used to be a sand pirate around these parts. But I don't want anyone to know that. Her old ship is outside of Oasis, I need you to scuttle it and erase all the evidence of the creepy stuff my gram-gram used to do. Go get the explosives I stashed for you."

"Now we have a job / it is time to get started / can I drive this time?" Zero asked.

Maya nodded her assent and hopped on the machine gun mount in the back of the Sandskiff.

They sail rather unorthodox-ly on the boardwalk and off to the left past shade's shack on a raised section of rock towards the location Aubrey marked on their ECHO. Along the way they encounter some try tailed stalkers, but Zero managing the Harpoon manages to not only keep them at bay – but eliminate them as well.

The explosives are contained within a wreck of small ship sitting slightly in the sand on its side.

Aubrey provides a brief comment, "Thanks for agreeing to destroy gram-gram's old ship. I don't wanna tell you the kind of stuff she was guilty of, but let's just say it rhymes with "child-schmafiking", And some "Schmanibalism" on the side."

After grabbing the explosives and gingerly strapping them to her pack, Maya jumps back into the Sandskiff. Zero directs her to the wreck of the Koronus. The two have a lovely conversation where Zero at first tries to get Maya to talk about her feelings on the 'event'. Instead all he gets out of her is a dissatisfied retort, "This place hasn't come up with any good loot yet."

As Maya pulls up alongside the Koronus, Zero grabs the explosives from Maya's pack and jumps out. After attaching it to the middle section of the wreck, Zero jumps back on the Sandskiff and Maya takes them to the detonation switch.

A little distance away from the Koronus, on an outcropping of rock a small collection of huts contain some sand pirates. Zero quickly deals with them while Maya hurries to the detonation switch, she depresses it and the entire middle section of the shipwreck explodes in a fiery fashion.

Aubrey comes on the ECHO and says, "Great! Now nobody can ever find out I was related to that child-schmafiking bitch. Get back to the bounty board whenever you're done here. I mean I don't really care, but whatever."

The duo sails back to Oasis in silence, Maya's still upset that she hasn't found any good loot yet. As they both hop out of the Sandskiff, Zero shifting his sniper rifle catches – by chance – a mysterious bottle in the far off distance. With red exclamation point Zero practically drags Maya back on the Sandskiff after a short trip they sail off a ramp and into the middle of a pirate camp, after joyfully eliminating the pirates Maya discovers the Message in a Bottle.

"You have found one of Captain Blade's bottles. Inside the bottle you will find a key. The key opens a chest the chest has loot. The loot will help you kill things. Find the chest my friend," Shade says.

While heading back to Oasis, Maya examines the map as Zero takes a turn driving. Maya gets excited since Captain Blade was a legendary treasure hoarder, and that meant following his bottles would lead to some sweet treasure. The moment they get back, Zero goes to turn in the mission they did for Aubrey at the bounty board. Maya saying, "I'll catch you later," goes and searches for the treasure.

Maya finds a garage door with an x marked on it. She hits the switch to open it, and find a chest full of loot a badass weapon, and an ECHO recorder.

"Blade's log. Had to stage another fake execution today. One of the cooks was caught stealing from the treasure hold, so I had to pretend to kill him to keep the rest of the crew in line. Gave him enough cash to disappear, shot him overboard with a blank – [sigh]. Keeping up this "fearsome captain blade" routine is a hell of a lot of work."

Meanwhile Zero reaches the battle board and turns in the mission from Aubrey.

Aubrey responds with, "I godamn hate my great grandma."

**A/N: Just a quick update, the next chapter will be two more side missions again. Chapter 6 will be a main mission for sure, and it's where we'll meet Captain Scarlett! (^_^)**


	5. Chapter 5: Falling Out Of Normality

**Chapter 5: Falling Out Of Normality Mission(s): Man's Best Friend * Side Mission**

**Wingman * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

"Hey. Vault Hunter guy. Need your help. My grandma used to be friends with Captain Blade – that guy who buried the treasure. He left his pet stalker to my grandma when he died, and she took care of it and stuff but when she died and left it to me, and I'm like, "I don't wanna take care of a friggin' stalker they're gross!" So go kill it for me, it's in Oasis somewhere."

After reuniting Maya and Zero accept the second mission from Aubrey. They hop in their Sandskiff, and Maya drives off to the left going out of the hangers. Driving under an archway Maya goes forward a ways until she turns right up a slope. Coming to poles in the ground that act as barriers, Maya and Zero enter the sectioned off area on foot.

"Hey, you found the stupid thing. Great. Be careful – my grandma used to feed orphans to it, so if your parents are dead, like, be careful or whatever. He might be able to smell your orphan musk," Aubrey says.

The stalker is big and requires some work, but using teamwork and more than one gun Maya and Zero eventually get the job done. It takes a few hours though, due to its shield and thick armor like skin.

"You killed Captain Blade's stupid stalker. Yaaay. Go back to the bounty board and I'll pay you," Aubrey says congratulating them.

Right after killing Tinkels Maya checks her ECHO device for any more missions, she sees that Shade is requesting one and turns to Zero. He seems to have disappeared however, but a note is attached to Tinkel's corpse. It reads 'I will be resting / tell me when you've found Scarlett / I can't tell you why'.

Maya is at first confused, but then realizes that Zero is suffering from the 'event'. She decides to continue, and do the mission from Shade.

"Friend I have a…sensitive matter. You have met Natalie, yes? The town sexpot? She and I, you could say are…an item. I've planned to make her my wife, but I've lost the engagement ring. Could you find it for me? Please."

Going farther into the area, Maya finds a hidden pirate camp. After eliminating rapscallions, pirates, and a few grog masters she finds the wedding ring in a small metal shelf rack.

Shade's voice informs Maya, "You've found the ring? Oh, happy days – please, I feel too shy to propose myself; could you do me the favor of asking Natalie to marry me?"

Maya gets in the Sandskiff this time alone, and finds herself wanting of Zero's company. He may have been silent but he treated her well, and Maya couldn't figure out why he would've disappeared like that.

Sailing alone Maya arrives back at Oasis. She parks the Sandskiff – just looking at it reminds her of Zero – and starts climbing some buildings to get to another one of Shade's corpses. After climbing up a ladder and across a couple building's rooftops Maya find Natalie stretch across two makeshift wooden beach chairs – set up so their ends touched. A beach umbrella stands directly over Natalie, but it has some holes in it.

Shade whispers to Maya, "Just slip the ring onto her finger and see what she says."

"Oh, Shade! Marriage?! This is moving so fast – and ya know I don't believe in marriage! I'm sorry, Shade, but the answer is no!" Natalie says.

Shade says in disbelief, "She said NO?! Oh, woe is me! I gave you my HEART, Natalie! Return to me, friend! At least you have not betrayed me yet."

Testing the velocity of Oasis, Maya jumps down from the building's rooftop. "Yep still low velocity," Maya – getting worried about Zero now – goes to Shade and turns in the mission.

"Stuck up bitch," Shade says this and Maya's offended, but she then realized he's talking about Natalie.

Still looking around for Zero, Maya goes back to the bounty board and turns in the mission they both did for Aubrey.

Aubrey gives her response, "Here. Money. Woooo."


	6. Chapter 6: Meet the Bloody Queen

**Chapter 6: Meet the Bloody Queen**

**Mission(s): A Warm Welcome * Main Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Shade's voice comes from his shack echoing across the dark courtyard, "Captain Scarlett has been tracking the treasure of the sands for several years – you should sail out to meet her in your Sandskiff!"

By now it's getting late, but Maya doesn't want to fall asleep without Zero. She has a feeling that he doesn't sleep, and since he cares for her so much he'll guard her no matter what. Maya hops in the Sandskiff, and tears out of the hanger with a long push from the afterburner.

She sails through Oasis, past the place where her and Zero killed the sand worm queen, and to the Wurmwater Passage.

Shade says in protest, "Wait, you're going NOW?! We were just beginning to connect!"

The first thing Maya sees when entering Wurmwater is a giant skeleton of a very large fish, that's long enough to be considered a Wurm. Sailing to the right Maya passes under a few archways of rock. Turning left down into a cove, Maya beholds Captain Scarlett's looming ship – hidden away to the right in a recess of the hidden cove.

A woman who could only be Captain Scarlett says, "Huh. Is that a skiff coming from Oasis? That's, uh – alright well –"

"Sandman wants your part of the compass bitch, hand it over!"

" And I'm being attacked. Great. Wonderful. Hey stranger – you give me a hand with Sandman's boys; I'll make it worth your while all right?"

Maya's lips turned up in a grin, it had been so long since she had a proper vehicle battle. However she was slightly disappointed when the rockets made short work of their three Sandskiffs. The explosions made up for it though.

"Huh. Killed 'em all? Nice. Get up here and we can talk business," Captain Scarlett says.

Maya drives up to the back of Scarlett's ship, and a platform lowers with a ladder attached to it. Parking the Sandskiff, Maya climbs up the ladder and walks forward into the bowls of the ship. Its surprisingly clean and there are a few pirates milling about, Maya spots a locked door – too heavily reinforce to be a good thing. Thinking some horrible monster is hiding behind it, Maya quickly ascends the stairs to the deck of the ship.

Zero sits trapped inside the room, behind the heavily locked door, contemplating how to murder his kidnapper.

Up on the deck Maya sees a pirate fall from the crow's nest; a woman slides down the ladder, starts talking, introduces herself and shoots the downed pirate twice in the head.

"Nice moves out there – you're a Vault Hunter, ya? Never meet one of you guys before. The guns, the power – it's all – very striking. If you're looking for the treasure of the sands, you've come to the right chick. But – gah – I'm being rude. Haven't even introduced myself! Do that a lot. Sorry. I'm uh, Captain Scarlett. Nice to meet ya!"

Maya is stricken with Captain Scarlett, almost as much as she is with Zero – wherever he is. She walks over to Scarlett and says, "Hello, my name's Maya."

"Oh right. I should probably get you up to speed on the legend of the treasure, eh?" Captain Scarlett asks.

"Yeah maybe, can I like stay here? In a bed and stuff?" Maya responds.

Scarlett nods and directs a crew member to show Maya to her own chambers. Maya is taken to the captain's quarters, and despite the fact that Scarlett would be joining her soon, Maya falls onto the bed almost immediately. After the crew member leaves, Maya undresses and taking her PJs from her pack and puts them on – she puts her pack on the floor under the bed.

Maya snuggles under the extravagant covers and falls asleep and indeed a short while later Captain Scarlett comes into her bedroom and sees Maya asleep under her covers, smiling she undresses and dispensing with the PJs slips under the covers as well.

Not knowing who really came into bed with her – and thinking it was Zero – Maya snuggles up to Captain Scarlett.

**A/N: If you didn't know the bedroom scene wasn't in the DLC, I just put that in there because 1) it's my fanfic 2) I am writing this with a slight AU.**


	7. Chapter 7: Life with Pirates

**A/N: This one is unique in that it's the first time I've done more than 2 missions in one chapter. Hope it still works, enjoy your reading. **

**Chapter 7: Life with Pirates **

**Mission(s): Ye Scurvy Dogs * Side Mission **

**Message In A Bottle * Side Mission**

**Smells Like Victory * Side Mission**

**Declaration Against Independents * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty!**

After waking up Maya finds herself alone in Scarlett's bed. After getting dressed and putting on a smaller version of her pack she goes out on deck. Trying to get Zero off her mind she spots a bounty board, jumping down Maya checks for some missions to occupy her time. Realizing she'll only have time for one mission, Maya takes the closest one and find one that's located near the entrance to Wurmwater from Oasis.

"Hey – I'm Mercer, the cook for this dumbass crew. You know the number two top killer of sand pirates? Scurvy. Number one is self-inflicted gun shot wounds, but that ain't really my department. Get me some fruit will ya?"

Maya descends down through the ship and comes out the backside. Looking down Maya discovers that her and Zero's Sandskiff is missing. "That must mean …" Maya hopes desperately that Zero is alive; in the mean time Maya spawns a temporary Sandskiff.

Maya failed to check her surroundings while leaving the ship. If she had been paying attention, she would've known that the locked door earlier had been sliced into 7 different parts – and subsequently shoved inside some pirate's throats. But it had happened about 3 hours before Maya had awoken, and Captain Scarlett had cleaned up the mess.

Maya sails back the way she came the day before, and this time instead of going through Wurmwater passage she goes left and parks the Sandskiff. Past the catch-a-ride station Maya sees a pirate village constructed in from the rocky ledge overlooking the sand flats. After heading up some stairs, and eliminating a few sand pirates with a Jakobs sniper rifle Maya came to the main pirate housing area.

Surrounded by small buildings and in the middle of a courtyard, buried in the sand halfway sticking out of the ground are two anchors leaning up against each other. Surrounding them haphazardly placed are groups of benches. A few clothes lines stretch above the camp, and as soon as Maya gets close enough the doors open and Pirates come out of the houses.

Except for a Corsair – pirate wielding two swords – Maya easily took out the pirates with the same sniper rifle. Taking cover behind the two anchors Maya was able to systematically and efficiently eliminate the small group of pirates. Heading to the ridge Maya discovers palm trees, looking closer Maya finds fruit growing among their leaves she begins collecting 20 of them thinking it would be enough.

Mercer says, "You found some fruit, good. Now –

"Ow!"

"Oh for the love of – sorry, Murray just shot himself in the leg. Hey Murray, know what'll cheer you up? Some vitamin C!"

"SANDMAN ATE MY PARENTS!" Murray shouted, both him and Mercer talking over the ECHOnet.

Mercer responds with, "Oh, suck it up Murray!"

After getting a laugh out of the way, Maya realized she wanted to do one last thing. Still hungry for loot, Maya brought out Captain Blade's Orphan Maker - just in case. Looking to an unusual palm tree, Maya spies another message in a bottle. Scaling a small part of the rock, Maya puts away her shotgun. Walking forward slowly Maya walks on the tree and it feels oddly metal.

Maya opens the bottle and finds yet another map. Working her way back through the pirate village, Maya discovers the old Sandskiff … and Zero sitting in the driver's seat. After a brief moment of confusion Zero says quite calmly, "Looks like I am back / and I will stick by your side / no matter the cost."

Maya takes a back seat, and hands the treasure map over to Zero. No word of explanation is needed, and Zero takes off. After circling a few rock formations Zero comes to cove like inlet carved into the rock. They come to a place called Hegeland Camp; it's full of pirates and a few Corsairs at that. Now that the duo is back together they make short work of the pirates. Going farther in they come to a circular dead end, a small anchor is embedded in the middle of a patch of sand flats.

Several sand worms pop up and both Maya and Zero switch to their sniper rifles. Taking careful aim, and strafing side to side to avoid the acid globs one by one headshot by headshot the worms are eliminated. Maya explains how she found the treasure last time by looking for an x, after combing the small patch of sand flats Zero finds in off to the left.

Captain Blade's ECHO recording, "After two years, three hundred looted sand barges, and no casualties, I think the men are starting to unravel. They wanna kill stuff. They wanna split the loot and head their separate ways. They don't seem to get the fact that our whole operation isn't about greed or bloodlust – it's about survival. We stop robbing ships we starve, we split up we die. I won't let that happen."

Maya and Zero sail back to the ship, and work their way to the kitchen. They turn in the mission Maya did, and the fruit to Mercer who says, "Don't worry about Murray he'll be fine, until he finds out I'M the one who killed his parents. But they were dicks, so, whatever."

Maya still wanting to spend as much time with Zero as possible, without Captain Scarlett realizing he's with her goes to the bounty board.

"Mercer here – I just finished cooking a badass meal of gasoline and shoe polish, but no one can enjoy it with Shiv-Spike around. Have you meet Shiv-Spike? He's our radio operator you should go meet him."

Maya wants to ask Zero a few questions but Zero whispers in her ear, "Not right now my dear / now's not the time for questions / I'll tell all later." Excited by the prospect of talking to her idol, Maya drags Zero on two more missions before their big talk. Heading to the plank – which is really an extended piece of metal – they come upon Shiv-Spike tied to a pole at the end of the plank.

Shiv-Spike says rather unpleasantly, "I WILL PUKE BLOOD INTO YOUR SOUL!"

"Kind of an asshole, isn't he? And beyond that he smells like a corpse somebody vomited up. I wanna feed Shiv-Spike to the sand grubs, but he stinks so bad they won't eat 'em. Get some condiments, we got to make shivy look appetizing," Mercer says.

Maya and Zero head back to their Sandskiff, and Maya has the idea of dealing with the Union sand pirates first. Zero agrees, but only after listening to the message.

"This is to the jackass who just arrived in Oasis! We don't take kindly to independent treasure hunters here – we're Union Sand Pirates. Now we're callin' you out scab, our union verses you. Hell no we won't go! Hell no we won't go!"

Maya tells Zero of some Sandskiff sized holes in the rock wall, and he agrees that there would be where they would fine them. Using a combination of driving skills from Zero plus well timed rockets, and Maya's skill with the mounted gun picking off the passengers of the rival Sand skiffs – it doesn't take long to wipe most of them out.

After giving the Union a thrashing, Maya and Zero continue with the Shiv-Spike mission.

After fighting the Union, Zero sails the Sandskiff, and Maya plus his full pack and Maya's light pack, through Wurmwater. After a while Zero and Maya come upon a place called Old Murphy's Canyon. It contains a sand pirate operation, on the bed of the canyon and on a walkway constructed halfway up the canyon wall. It doesn't run along both walls but switches twice with small makeshift bridges spanning the gap.

Maya and Zero at first go along the bottom, picking off a few pirates up top. Both of them refill on ammo from the vending machine. After that they head back along the canyon, and traverse the walkway eliminating the pirates as they go. Near the end they encounter two Badass Pirates, and Maya has to Phaselock both of them one after the other while Zero headshots them.

At the end of the walkway, on a picnic table to the left of a treasure chest sits the condiments. Maya grabs it and puts them in her pack.

Mercer says, "Got some condiments? Great. Bring that stuff back here and we'll try and mask the stink."

After that it's a relatively short ride back to Captain Scarlett's ship, the two climb back up into the ship. Once they get on board the crew mills about as usual, but they seem to be avoiding the pair of them more than usual. Climbing up to the lower outer deck, Maya with Zero close behind walks up to Shiv-Spike and slathers him in the condiments.

Mercer says right before they do, "Just slather Shiv-Spike in those condiments. It'll be gross but at least…it'll…eh, I guess it'll just be gross."

"YOUR LUNGS WILL HOLD MY FUTURE CHILDREN!" Shiv-Spike shouts.

"Great, now just push him in and let the sand grubs do the rest," Mercer says.

Maya grins at Zero, he takes the cue and they both punch him overboard at the same time. He falls and is devoured by a few sand grubs.

As he falls Shiv-Spike screams, "I AM A SENTIENT COLLECTION OF HATRED AND FEAR!" The sand grubs then devour shiv-Spike, and all is silent for a moment.

"Ya know I think I'm gonna miss him. Anyway, good job. Come one back," Mercer says and after they turn in the mission he adds. "Actually you know what? I don't miss him at all, heh."


	8. Chapter 8: Enter Sandman To His Death

**Chapter 8: Enter Sandman … To His Death**

**Mission(s): Two Easy Pieces * Main Mission**

**Message In A Bottle * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Since it was late Maya wanted to sleep, but she also really wanted to talk with Zero. Zero had the same idea but since he realized Maya couldn't stay up as late as he could, he suggested sleep was a top priority at the moment. When Zero asks where Maya slept last night she responds, "Captain Scarlett's bed."

Zero leads her there and helps her get in. Zero leaves and goes up to the crow's nest, mainly to get out of the way. When morning comes Zero scales the ladder down and finds Maya standing there, the early morning stripping away her normal expression. Now that Zero sees below the mask, he can't help but wonder, "Is Maya a challenge?"

No time to think further as Captain Scarlett comes up to the pair of them; Maya blinks and asks the obvious question, "What's up with you two?" Referring to the fact that she hadn't seen Zero until boarding the ship. Completely ignoring her however, Captain Scarlett says something that puts petty discussion to an end.

"So, the legend says that whoever gets all four pieces of the mystical compass will find the lost treasure. I've got a piece, because I'm awesome, but Sandman has one too. Head to Hayter's Folly, kill Sandman, and get his piece of the compass sound good?"

Maya and Zero push away from each other mentally, because they feel as if they're about to fall apart, and both of them realize it more then ever. Hurrying now they both hop in the Sandskiff and take off in the direction of the objective marker. They start from the back of Scarlett's ship do a u-turn and head in the opposite direction towards the front of the ship. They keep going, turn left and pass between two rocky cliffs.

The area widens out into sand flats, after crossing the flats and going up a hill Maya and Zero sail straight back through Wurmwater pass and into Oasis.

Captain Scarlett comes on and asks, "Got a minute? I'm trying out some new catchphrases. Lemme know if any of these grab you. Yarr. Avast Maytey. Yo ho ho. Hoist the main sail! Walk the plank! Shiver me timbers! Oh that one didn't work at all."

The brief comic reprieve from Captain Scarlett is enough to get both Maya and Zero in the zone. Both of them are happier to make things simpler and just go with the friendship off the field, and become badass killing machines on it.

As Maya and Zero come out of the pass a cliff containing a pirate village blocks them. Not feeling like killing pirates until they're supposed to – both of them don't know why but they silently agree on it – Zero sails to the left around the giant rocky structure. And then to the right under an archway and straight on wards up a hill.

"If you're wondering why I'm sending you to kill Sandman instead of doing it my self first of all, good question. Nice to see, you've taken he initiative. Second of all, Sandman's pretty strong and you're expendable as hell so good luck!"

After those comforting words from Captain Scarlett Maya and Zero disembark at a place called Coastal Caverns. Nothing much happens as they head down the path, but once they turn the corner and come upon a great drop in the earth. Constructed in that drop is a pirate village, and many pirates come out. Everything seems to be sorting itself out; Zero and Maya stand at the top of the hill and aim down with their sniper rifles picking the pirates off.

Out of nowhere a Corsair stabs Maya twice in the stomach, at the same time with two swords. Zero twists and at point blank range blows the pirate's head off, and the rest of the body goes flying sideways and smacks into the cliff wall. Maya grunts and is forced to phaselock both swords out of her body – Zero couldn't do it since he had to take care of some Pirate gunners (nasty bastards with sniper rifles).

Zero is worried about Maya that she won't survive, Maya says she's fine and just ties a simple brace to stop the blood from flowing. "I'll be fine she says," she says. "It's just that I may not want to get into close combat for a bit, I can still fight but just … from a distance." Maya smiles to try and alleviate the inconvenience.

As soon as the smile came Zero responded with, "Don't worry Maya / I'm just as good with melee / as with the sniper." Indicating his katana, Maya realizes this was true. She sometimes forgot that he was both a master at close and long ranged combat. Now that the situation has been taken down to somewhat of a dull roar, Maya and Zero head down the slope and into the cave.

Shade comes on and says, "…So there is a lot of water under the city of Oasis? What a surprise. Oh, sorry – I hacked into your ECHO device shortly after we meet, so I can see everything you can. I get horrifically bored, and it's fun to watch you kill people."

"And he was right," Maya says. "There is a lot of water down here. And in a cave you know what that means?" Zero looks at her; foolishly Maya takes that as a blank expression and blurts out, "Crysalisks!" Zero does something he doesn't do unless they're alone and not on a mission, speak not in Haiku form, "I know that."

Zero walks down the wooden constructed path, but Maya simply jumps off the railing and lands in the water. Grinning like a fool, Maya fills up the water containers she carries in her bag. Zero looks at her for a moment, and realized that he doesn't have any in his pack.

Regardless Zero realizes he his thirsty and asks Maya for some water, how does he do the asking? By saying something in Maya's native language, the supposedly dead language that existed long ago on Maya's home planet. Maya gives him one of the canteens, and turning around Zero temporarily takes off him helmet. Maya's curious, but right then she spots what looks like a badass pirate sauntering ahead at the mouth of a tunnel and across from the small pond of water.

Zero hands the canteen back to Maya telling her in her own language thanks. He spies the badass as well, but also sees a second. Splitting up they each take down one and continue on down the tunnel (back side by side of course).

Shade comes on again and says, "It's a good thing no one in Oasis is dying of thirst – otherwise the sight of that enormous spring might fill me with a tragic rage! Hahahahahahahahahahah!"

Maya says, "Aw look at the water … and the crystal monsters, but as I like to call them … WALKING MONEY!"

Maya and zero descend upon the poor crysalisk and blast off the crystals on its legs. Soon after it explodes and now valuable crystals litter the ground. Maya's glad that her back contains a capacity to hold infinite money, she collects half Zero talking the other half.

As they continue along they encounter several skags jumping down from atop rocky pillars, a few more crysalisks, and as they near the end of the long tunnel (occasionally lit by torches, and all the time by the glowing water) they encounter a rock like wall blocking their path. But on and over this wall is a walkway, and several pirates stand on it.

It goes well … both Maya and Zero still being able to pick them off since there's no cover for them. However 3 more crysalisks pop out of the ground out of nowhere, and Maya is forced to use a Nasty Rifle. The trademark Torgue explosive damage makes surprisingly quick work of the crysalisks.

After Zero finishes off the remaining pirates, both him and Maya scale the walkway and go over the top of the rocky divide.

"Way back when Sandman and I were like this. Oh, right you can't see through the radio – I'm crossing my first two fingers. Like this. Best buds, until we stumbled on some of Captain Blade's old notes about the lost treasure that is. Together Sandman and I discovered two pieces of Blade's mystical compass. Then, because I'm an idiot, I tried to stab him in the back, literally. The knife blade snapped, he shot me in the leg and ran…it was pretty embarrassing. But that's when I learned – never betray your friends, until you're sure you've got the upper hand."

Maya and Zero share a brief glance, they Zero makes Maya a promise to slay her when this is all over. For some reason Maya doesn't like that idea, and convinces Zero to hold off and basically forget that idea. After rising over the divide they discover it was merely a cliff, and at the top a tunnel. After walking down the tunnel they come to a walkway/camp/hideaway build on stilts above several pools of green water, and wrapped around the canyon wall on the walkway sits a collection of pirate dwellings.

More fun underground murder commences, but a new enemy encounter has Maya reeling with pain. A buccaneer, bulky pirate carrying two flaming hot swords that loves to get up close and personal. Maya blasts his head off easily enough with Miss Moxxi's Heartbreaker but it costs some of her regeneration when the Buccaneer slices her stomach just a tad. Both wounds are causing intense amounts of pain, and Maya ends up falling on the floor silently writhing.

In her moment of weakness Maya utters to Zero, "Slay every last on of these bastards, I want the water to stain the pools below and their bodies too…" The pain becomes too much and Maya ends up going into what Dr. Zed lovingly refers to as a pain coma.

"I told you to lay off – now I gotta kill you, your friends, AND your family!" Sandman says edgily.

"How would he even know where your family lives? He's – just ignore him, he's talking crap," Captain Scarlett says encouragingly.

Zero smiles under his helmet and a red :D symbol appears above his helmet. Causing his expression to go blank, Zero goes into his concentration mode.

"Where's Maya?" Captain Scarlett asks. "She down and out or something – don't worry, I know for a fact that Sandman has a cure for whatever's ailing her – you'll have to kill him to get it." *** 1**

Zero is glad now that there are two challenges to take on: 1) killing Sandman plus the remaining sand pirates 2) saving Maya from 3 deadly sword wounds (the first two obviously causing lots of internal bleeding and rupture of the organs the last being a very … hot problem). He continues on wards and comes to a gate that's locked and lowered, Zero's about to slice through it when he hears slow footsteps and labored breathing approaching from behind.

The voice carries the same tone of Zero's dreams – contrary to popular belief Zero can dream … just daydream not actual night dreaming – and he knows right away that it's Maya. "There's a switch up this ladder, I wanna get it. It looks like it goes to the gate." By now Zero would've got the gate 'open' but since Maya looks like she wants to help in order to try and make up for her current uselessness, Zero shuts up and patiently waits while Maya slowly and ever so gingerly climbs the long ladder.

About halfway up Maya stops and calls down desperately for help getting up. Still trying not to upset her too much Zero does as she asks. Zero jams a med syringe into Maya's lower back and depresses the plunger. "Ah HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!" Maya screams, and after a moment says, "Ow, my injuries hurt like hell but I can still move."

Zero climbs back down the ladder and Maya up. Once Maya flips the switch she climbs back swiftly down the ladder again, and lets loose a scream of pain "AAAAAHHHHHHHHH DEAR FLAMING SATAN IT BURNS!" Zero realizes that the syringe did more damage then good, and if he doesn't kill Sandman quick and get the cure Maya will die.

Zero knowing he won't have time for fun and games, pulls out an incendiary Norefleet. Walking forwards Zero discovers Sandman is actually very small, and a big brute covered in armor called the Big Sleep seems to be the brawn of the whole operation.

"You really shoulda died when I told you to. Now you're gonna learn that big pain … comes from small packages!" Sandman yells in challenge.

The Norefleet makes short work of both of them.

Captain Scarlett says, "Sandman's dead? Wonderful, now find his piece of the compass. I'd be there to help you but I'm currently reading the latest issue of Crime Fighter Frog … it's about a frog who fights crime." *** 1**

Zero loots Sandman's corpse and finds a syringe filled with purple liquid. Rushing back Zero desperately searches for Maya. Not finding her Zero spies a trail of frightening blood leading up to the water, listening Zero hears an odd splashing noise. Finding the source of it and pulling Maya from the water Zero sticks the needle under her left breast past her rib cage and straight into her heart. Maya's eyes widened and she sits up slightly dazed. Zero tells her that Sandman and his henchman is dead, and Maya is reinvigorated. Still very sore and in pain from her injuries, Maya is still able to get up however.

She puts a arm around Zero's shoulders and leans on him as he leads her to the chest looking most suspicious, opening it Maya and Zero find the piece of the compass and an audio diary belonging to Sandman.

"Dear diary: I know where the third compass piece is – Hyperions got it! Judging by what they've been saying over the radio they think it's just some trinket. They're gonna ship it out on a caravan out in Wurmwater. I've just gotta – Aw great. That jackass from Oasis is comin' after me. B-R-B diary."

"Well that's lucky. Come on back to Wurmwater so we can get the third compass piece and be that much closer to finding the treasure," Captain Scarlett says.

Zero checks his map and sees a shorter way to get back to the fast travel station at the beginning of the area. Zero know Maya shied away from Fast Travel stations because they reminded her too much of Gaige. But he knew she had to get rest as soon as possible. As they approached a lift system, and Zero hit the switch to activate it Maya looks to her left and down. "Oh my god, a message in a bottle!"

Maya after taking another syringe from Zero, jumps down a few ledges and snags the message in the bottle, which is stuck among some small pieces of junk. After grabbing it Maya jumps back in the water, and takes the lift back up to Zero. Zero then snags the map from Maya and leads her back through Sandman's place, along a ledge attached to the rock wall, under a waterfall and to another empty bottle.

Maya smashes it and an entire section of the rock wall falls away to reveal a hidden cave. Zero sees an x marked on the ground at the back of the cave, and as Maya goes in he sees a crysalisk rise from the ground, Maya just takes Captain Blade's Orphan maker and makes quick work of its leg crystals. After divvying up the money crystals, Zero and Maya dig up the treasure and listen to Captain Blade's log together.

"The crew are going to mutiny. The cook I pretended to kill? They found him sittin' around in Oasis while I was guarding the boat. After they strung him up they got to talkin'. Found out I'd never killed another soul in my life. My guess is they'll raid the treasure room for guns and shoot me while my back is turned. Might as well let 'em do it – I'd rather be killed then wipe out my own men. This 'ill be my last log entry, Captain Blade signing off."

After finding the message in a bottle, Zero leads Maya back to the fast travel station and they're digistructed back on Captain Scarlett's ship. "No time to waste," Maya says. And grudgingly Zero helps Maya over to the catch-a-ride station built into the lower rear of the ship (how in god's name Scooter managed to get Captain Scarlett to install a catch-a-ride station, Zero will probably never know) and Zero summons their Sandskiff.

Zero gets in the more versatile gunner position behind Maya who grabs the driver's seat. It takes a while and almost comes to nighttime, but after scouring the desert Maya finally finds the Hyperion caravan hidden away in a remote part of Wurmwater. 3 badass loaders guard the three-hover flatbed trolleys carrying three chests.

After whipping out the three badass loaders with Maya's corrosive smg, Zero hands the weapon back to Maya and opens the two gun chests. He gives Maya a better corrosive smg, and takes a slag Vladof E-tech sniper rifle for himself. Zero stands at Maya's side as she opens the middle chest containing the compass piece.

"You're—you're awesome. We're probably going to kill each other later, but for now I just want to say: well done. We only need one more compass piece before we can find the lost treasure, come on back!" Captain Scarlett says.

Maya and Zero climb back on the Sandskiff. Zero guides her and eventually Maya finds her way back to Captain Scarlett's ship. Zero doesn't have the heart at the moment to tell Maya that her ECHO device is broken, it would remind her too much of Gaige.

Maya and Zero both climb back up through the ship and to Captain Scarlett. She says something in conclusion of the long mission and the really long day.

"Three down one to go. Once we find the last compass piece we'll be able to discover where the lost treasure is buried."

*** 1 (I made this dialog up completely, please forgive me and it won't happen again … probably)**

*** 2 (this dialog may not be 100% accurate – when I say that I mean maybe one or two words I got wrong)**

**A/N: Apologies for such a long chapter. This'll happen with all the main missions from now on, so … yeah don't know what to say. Hope you enjoyed regardless, and if you've found any, ANY grammar errors PLEASE let me know. Thanks! (^_^)**


	9. Chapter 9: Time to Hunt

**A/N: If you see NC next to a mission it means I've only got a portion of it down in the chapter, the next chapter I will most likely complete it. If you don't see NC next to a mission, this means that the mission is completed within the chapter it is listed.**

**Chapter 9: It's Time to Hunt**

**Mission(s): Just Desserts for Desert Deserters * Side Mission (NC)**

**Grendel * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Maya lay in bed still not sure if she was ready to get up and face the day, she sat up not bothering with the covers and was rewarded with a rare show of emotion from Zero … decency. He looked away until Maya was dressed and said in a quite voice, "You like … wanna go do some more missions before we pull another long one with this Herbert dude?"

Zero agrees and they both head to the bounty board and pick up a mission from Captain Scarlett, who explains, "A few of my men deserted the ship when Sandman attacked. Could you kill them, please? Deserters really bug me, since I only have one rule on my ship: if you join it's for life. That, and no 'fatties'. Haha! Sorry. That was supposed to be a joke, yeah sorry."

After getting equipped they both head to their Sandskiff parked near the bottom of the ladder at the back of the ship. Before they jump down, Zero stops Maya and inquires about her injuries. After feeling for a moment, Maya goes the slow way down and climbs the ladder.

Once on the ground she takes the wheel and Zero hops in the gunner position. They then sail off to the first location, they end up sailing back to Oasis. After entering Oasis they sail left, and going a ways sailing across the sand flats running over sand grubs and around rock formations they come to the one place; the place where they collected the pirate prosthetics for Shade.

With a little more caution due to the uncertainty of Maya's condition, Zero and her take things a little slower then they did last time. Using sniper rifles Maya and Zero say in two spots and pick off the two groups of enemies that come their way. The first spot is behind a dumpster, the second spot is at the top of a ramp further inside the camp.

Once they rabble had been eliminated they find a sand pirate called Benny the Booster, freakishly deformed but still easily enough to take care of (mainly because he didn't have a helmet on).

"Ah – that was my old cook. Tried to poison my food 6 times before he realized I always make my puppies test my food for me. Sometimes I really miss Bousers number 7 through 13," Captain Scarlett says.

Zero checks his ECHO device and discovers that the next deserter is back in Hayter's Folly. After asking Maya if she knows of any other missions they have going there she checks her ECHO device and discovers that at the bounty board in Oasis Sir Hammerlock is requesting a mission.

After telling Zero as much they went back through the camp and hopped back in their Sandskiff. They sailed back to Oasis and temporarily parked in one of the two hangers, a tiny debate rose as to who would stay behind with the skiff. In the end they both went not daring to leave the other alone.

Maya and Zero walk up to the bounty board and accept the mission from Sir Hammerlock.

"Pip pip! Sir Hammerlock here with a bit of a job for you. I've heard tell of some…creature sneaking around Hayter's Folly, stealing treasure, slicing off faces and the like. Sounds terribly interesting, hunt it down would you?"

Maya and Zero both look at each other and admit, at the same time, "Wouldn't it be better to use the Fast Travel?" Deciding to try and move on from what had happened before, Maya and Zero both trudge up the road they had started their current adventure on and came to the fast travel station. Looking up the locations, Zero selected Hayter's Folly the same time as Maya.

Maya and Zero digitize into the familiar place of Hayter's Folly, granted it wasn't a cheery place for either of them. They both jump down into the pool and head forwards up a walkway into a tunnel. Another two badass pirates are there and are therefore disposed of, Maya comments, "Is it just me or do they bad guys seem to be spawning … like after we kill them?"

Zero beats down this question when he shows her the other two bodies of the other two badasses they had killed. "Guess the rats didn't come / they usually swarm and eat / make bodies go poof." Zero said in his Haiku voice, which made Maya laugh. As they walked down the tunnel Maya was careful to not step in the river running through the tunnel.

Maya leads Zero down the walkway into the cavern; they approach the spring, which had multiple waterfalls trickling down out of a hidden source. After poking around a bit, Maya finds a hidden walkway (Zero had seen it when they had come in but he dared not mention anything). They followed it and came to a tunnel lit by a crystal's glow.

Sir Hammerlock says something before they face Grendel, "When you do find this creature, please deal with it quickly. The poor fellow who ECHOed me about the situation name of Jessie … well the creature wore his face like a jockstrap."

At the start of the tunnel, and only after going in a bit a crysalisk pops up out of the ground. Zero shoots off two of its leg crystals, and then Maya kills it with a round from her Nasty Rifle. They then come to the end of the tunnel and come upon the lair of Grendel. Several piles of junk lay scattered about and compacted together. A somewhat circular path is cut through the junk stranding a pile of junk in the middle.

By the looks of things, and based on the few flashy signs contained within the junk, Maya could safely say that Grendel was a collector. They both jumped down into Grendel's lair/den and suddenly a giant green deformed and covered in junk half crysalisk half bullymong jumps out from behind a pile of junk and attacks the two Vault Hunters. The fights intense because of the shock of seeing something so sudden, but Maya manages to give it enough explosive rounds to knock it dead.

"You've killed it? Wonderful. Now if you could return to the bounty board, we can see about stapling Jessie's face back on to his skull," Sir Hammerlock says quite happily.

After killing Grendel they climbed out of its den through a tunnel that deposited them back at the starting pool. After coming back to the place where they had turned off to go fight Grendel, they instead turned left and took the lift up to save some time. They head up the tunnel, and come to Sandman's domain. Some of his henchmen are back and Maya and Zero take them out pretty quickly.

After dealing with the 5 Corsairs they turn right onto Sandman's Overlook. There they find Deckhand.

Captain Scarlett comes on again and says, "I remember him, Deckhand! Used to tell stories about how many children he killed. I've burned down my fair share of orphanages, but don't brag about it that's just rude!" **(again apologies I wasn't able to get this dialog exactly right)**

After killing Deckhand, Zero slit his throat with his katana and Maya dealt with his guard by phaslocking them then throwing their lifeless bodies off the edge of Sandman's Overlook; the pair walk back out of Sandman's domain down the tunnel down the lift and along their way.

Maya and Zero take one look at the Fast Travel station and decide to use it as often as possible, now more for convenience then a way to keep Gaige in their hearts. First Maya and Zero make a quick stop in Oasis and turn in the mission from Sir Hammerlock.

Sir Hammerlock says, "Good news, you don't have to help me staple Jessie's face back on because he is dead. Hemophilia ho …"


	10. Chapter 10: Rusting Hearts Part 1

**A/N: From this point onward I've decided not to mark whether or not the dialog is correct or original. I think those reminders just detract from the overall story. Besides I've played this DLC enough times to accurately guess the dialog.**

**Chapter 10: Rusting Hearts Part I**

**Mission(s): The Hermit * Main Mission**

**Just Desserts for Desert Deserters * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Maya stared up at the crow's nest; she turned to Zero and asked, "Have you ever been up there?" Zero shook his head and nodded to Captain Scarlett who seemed to be waiting. They walked over to her and sure enough she was.

"I don't know where the last part of the compass is, but…I know someone who might. His name is Herbert, and he lives out in the Rustyards. Take that gift box over there."

Looking to her left, Maya finds a neat gift box and picks it up putting it in her pack.

"Hold on to that gift and don't give it to Herbert until I tell you to. Now go meet up with him. Off with you, now."

Heeding Captain Scarlett's words and heading to the Sandskiff, Maya went down through the ship to get exercise instead of down the elevator. Zero simply just jumped off the back end of the ship and landed next to the Sandskiff.

Once Maya got there she claimed the turret position, and was silent forcing Zero to take the driver's seat. As they sailed off Captain Scarlett had something to say.

"Now you might be worried that once you get all 4 pieces of the compass, I'll kill you and take it for myself. Wrong. Even once complete, the compass still needs to be taken to a very secret location before it will reveal where Blade's treasure is buried. You can rest easy for now."

Zero sails forwards after taking a u-turn, all while Scarlett talks. When she finishes he takes a sharp right and sails up a hill and around a rocky ledge. They sail forwards until they come to a heavily fortified pirate camp. It's all one giant crisscrossing walkway built up above the sand flats supported by a few very short rocky pillars. Two automatic turrets stand ready to open fire, their positions given away by their red laser sights.

Taking her hands off the mounted gun Maya takes out her Jakobs sniper and takes aim at one of the turrets. After two shots it explodes, and luckily the explosion doesn't attract the attention of the other turret, pivoting to the left Maya takes aim and after two more shots eliminates the second turret.

At that point pirates take notice and Zero drives up, Maya hopes out and both of them decide to go for headshots. Playing the game is fun, going up on the walkway hiding behind crates when reloading, all brings the giddiness and insanity back into Maya's step. Zero knows this is good for her, since he had just spent the last year or so watching Maya during the campaign to take down Handsome Jack.

While exploring a side path to the walkway, Maya spots another auto turret. Zero takes it out this time with two shots. Taking the main route Maya and Zero hear a few Sandskiffs fly by underneath, and using the Norefleet Zero makes quick work of them. A cursed pirate gives them a little grief, but Maya quickly dispatches it with her Orphan Maker. They come to a choke point which ends in a barred off gate.

On either side of the gate are two cylindrical metal towers, mismatched but definitely sturdy. On top of the one on the left sits another gun turret, this one is taken out with one shot from Maya and one from Zero. Maya moves to the rights side and discovers a lever, she pulls it and the gate opens. Out comes a badass pirate, a double headshot from either side explodes his head clean off and into a bunch of tiny bits.

After admiring their work Maya and Zero enter the Rustyards, once they're inside they decide to kill Toothless Terry the next Deserter.

Captain Scarlett says, "Herbert, they guy you're looking for? I brought him on board a few months back 'cause he's stupidly knowledgeable about Captain Blade's treasure. Then I kicked him off because … you'll see." They arrive in the Rustyards and Captain Scarlett gives them a few words about Herbert. They decide to focus on Terry at the moment and continue onward. Thinking it's the shorter way Maya and Zero decide to go straight, instead they see a large gap that's impassable. They do find a platform system, but the switch isn't working and the platform was all the way on the other side.

With Maya sighing and Zero silently brooding, they both turned back and walked forward then started right.

"Oh, if Herbert asks about me, don't say anything."

After those words from Scarlett enemies started to appear from the various houses built out of scrap and rusty metal. A new enemy called a raider basically charges them with an ax or a random sharp and or blunt object. This is taken care of by a simple shotgun blast, but when two more raiders plus something even more terrifying comes their way Zero and Maya get their game faces on not really memorizing their surroundings for long unless necessary.

Two anchor mean, giant pirates with a chain machine on their back connecting two chains to two anchors held in either hand. A few more powder monkeys (basically grenade obsessed pirates with a keg of explosives containing those grenades strapped to their back), raiders, anchormen, pirates Maya and Zero finally make it to the gate to the only passageway to the other side of the gap.

Just before they can enter the gate, two anchormen and a whaler (same thing as anchorman just less armor and carrying a harpoon in either hand) block their path. Maya quickly steals their health away with her Orphan Maker. Zero just stands back and watches the carnage as Maya blasts them apart.

Once Maya finishes they both move forward together. They come to a place after passing through the gate called Rusty Cog Settlement. It's basically the rusted out re modified old interior skeleton of a ship that's half buried. A few of the inner scaffolding survived – that or it was just rebuilt or added on by the pirates – either way Maya and Zero have plenty of places to snipe the multiple enemies that abound from the woodworks or in this case metal works.

After moving forward they came to an inside portion with a few branching hallways. Going down one Maya finds a room used for quarters. She happily raids all the cash boxes on one side of the room while Zero takes the other side, finding a new doorway Zero beckons Maya over. Going through it they discover a chest inside it is a corrosive Hyperion sniper rifle and a Dahl smg … leaving them since they already got better loot Maya and Zero head further onward, doing battle with more pirates.

Suddenly as they come to a hole in the ship rockets come flying out from across the somewhat sandy divide. "Toothless Terry," Maya guesses and starts tossing Singularity grenades. After phaslocking Terry in one place Zero let fly one of his singularity grenades and Terry ended up exploding along with his fellow pirates into tiny bits.

"Crap – I can't remember that deserter's name. It was something unisexual, oh I feel really bad killing someone without knowing their name. TERRY! It was Terry! Whew, almost felt guilty there," Captain Scarlett, says. "Looks like that's all of 'em – head on back whenever you're ready!"

After eliminating Toothless Terry Maya and Zero jumped down to the sandy bottom inside the ship shell and turned to their right looking out of the hole.

Captain Scarlett: That looks creepy enough to be Herbert's shack up there on that ledge. Take the elevator up, knock on the door, and prepare for a smell straight out of your nightmares.

Maya and Zero move forward onto a walkway constructed entirely out of metal. After going down a few short switching stairs the two find themselves at the start of a bridge that extends to either side of the gap. After crossing it Maya looks to her right and sees an inactive generator. Hurrying over to it Maya switches it on and the platform is up and running.

Turning around Maya and Zero head forward and encounter some spiderants. Zero slices a few up with his katana, and Maya blasts the rest into oblivion with her shotgun. After that they move forward again and come to a cleverly constructed elevator consisting of a platform built on top of a four-pronged anchor. A chain runs up to a shipwreck's anchor system.

After riding it all the way to the extended wooden walkway constructed to perfectly match up with the elevators stopped position, Maya and Zero head to dry land. After getting on the same level ground as Herbert's shack, they encounter another group of spider ants. Maya throws her last singularity grenade and it gathers them all into one group.

The grenade explodes gloriously, and Zero finishes off any survivors with his melee weapon. They then both hurry along to the right to the walkway extending atop the ledge out two Herbert's creepy shack. They knock on the door and it opens, out steps Herbert and Maya can both see and definitely smell the obsessive creep on the old man.

"Hold on – hold on a second!" Herbert says then opens his door. "Scarlett?! Is that you?! Oh. You're not Scarlett…but I can taste her scent on you. She wants the last compass piece doesn't she? Ohhh, yeah. Let's talk, you and me."

Maya nods creeped out and Herbert says something else, "How is Scarlett? Is she as beautiful as a last saw her? Oh how the light caught her hair…"

After turning in the mission Maya and Zero find that it's really, really, really late. Maya checks her watch and finds it to be around 11:47 P.M. "Aw damnit! It's really that late?" Zero nods and leads Maya back across the cliff down the elevator, towards the generator, across the gap on the platform, and into one of the safer houses near the start of the Rustyards.

Herbert asks, "Are we gonna get to talking?"

Zero responds with, "She's had a long day / she suffered from injuries / she needs to sleep now." While Maya's sleeping Zero decides to turn in the mission about the deserters on his own, and tell Maya about the end when she wakes up.

After fast traveling to Captain Scarlett's ship Zero silently makes his way to the bounty board and turns in the mission.

"I really can't state how un-serious I was being about the no 'fatties' thing. I actually prefer overweight men," Captain Scarlett says.

Zero returns to Maya and sits at the foot of her bed resting his back up against the wall. As Maya sleeps, Zero stays ever vigilant.


	11. Chapter 11: Rusting Hearts Part 2

**A/N: Oh by the way I won't be uploading every day anymore … I'll make it every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.**

**Chapter 11: Rusting Hearts Part 2**

**Mission(s): Catch A Ride, and Also Tetanus * Side Mission (NC – they finish all the objectives just needs to be turned in)**

**Message In A Bottle * Side Mission**

**Crazy About You * Main Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Zero shook Maya's shoulder and held up her ECHO device. Maya grabbed it and turning it on said, "Hello?"

Scooter answered saying, "Sup, yo? This here Scooter commin' at you from Sanctuary. I needs me some old-ass scraps from y'alls Rustyard to keep the cities engines a turnin'. If it's sturdy and metallic and could give you lead poisoning just from lookin' at it? Grab it and ship it my way alright?"

Maya agreed to the mission and Zero followed once he saw Maya heading back through the long way around the gap. When he asked why Maya says, "We need to get some scrap parts for Scooter, on my ECHO there are two located in the old ship wreck. They make a trip back through the Rusty Cog Settlement. They came to a point just right of the entrance in a ways and sitting on 6 crates covered by a cloth. Maya insisting she's recovered enough from her injuries goes and retrieves a control switch.

They then come to the place where they killed Toothless Terry, after eliminating only a few pirates they went to the other side of the sand and searched the compacted collection of buildings. Zero finds a circuit box 5000 sitting on a crate.

After checking her ECHO map Maya tells Zero that they should probably finish up with Herbert at the same time as collecting the parts. Zero agreed and they crossed the bridge, headed up the elevator, blasted some spiderants, and knocked on Herbert's front door. He came out and started talking.

"If I help you complete the compass, Scarlett will be so happy – ohhh, yes. But no – the compass alone won't do. She needs to know how much I care…the TAPES! Yesss! Get the tapes, get the tapes! I'll mark them on your ECHO."

Taking the quick way down Maya and Zero jump down a rocky level, after landing Maya jogs forward hits the elevator switch to bring it back down then headed forward towards the ECHOs marked on both hers and Zero's maps. They went through a place called Coobie Gorge.

There were multiple spiderant hives along the wall of the gorge, Maya and Zero took care of them fairly easily both using explosive weapons. They found a bridge and crossed it going left across the gorge. After turning left again they encountered another group of spiderants. After eliminating them and Maya throwing a spiderant knight into the gorge, they both walked on a dangerous bridge. It was basically three medium metal platforms spaced apart and connected by chains.

Zero started lightly jumping across the platforms and landed on a small wreck of a ship. Right as Zero jumped on the wreckage an explosion happened scattering all the ECHOs in random locations.

"I was worried something like this would happen. Just…collect his little love letters as quick as you can. Sorry," Captain Scarlett says.

Maya walked up beside Zero and pointed out another part for Scooter. Maya picked up a rockbolt and shoved it in her pack, she said to Zero, "Looks like you'll have to put the rest in your extras pack – mine's full."

After acquiring the part Maya and Zero jumped back across the suspended metal platforms they headed right and went along the rock wall until they came to a door leading into a wreck of another ship. "Wait!" Maya said desperately, she turned around and dashed off crossing the bridge across the gorge. Maya then turns left and across a smaller bridge to a bit of a stranded pillar of rock attached to the rock wall. There in the middle of the platform sits the first ECHO.

"Scarlett…I wrote you a haiku. Ahem. You got a nice butt/You also got a nice chest/Your face is okay too – NO! SIX SYLLABELS! I screwed—OH, IT'S RUINED! GODAMNIT!"

Maya broke out in laughter and by the time she quieted down and got back to Zero she saw a :D symbol on Zero's helmet, it disappeared a moment later.. The door to the wreckage slammed down and two Anchormen charged out. After slamming his katana into the neck of one Zero watched as Maya Phaselocked one and not only threw it in the gorge put pumped it full of holes with her shotgun.

Maroonie's Clipper was the name of the wrecked ship and Maya looking to her left saw a nightmare. All uphill and heavily guarded even including a gun turret. Zero looked right however and not only spotted another scrap part but his intuition told him there was something more.

After climbing a staircase Zero entered a small enclosure and picked up the second to last scrap part for Scooter. Maya stuck her head out the window looking out against the metal side of the ship. Looking left she saw nothing, but looking right Maya spied another message in a bottle.

Not wasting any time because they had a lot to do Maya and Zero began the long and arduous climb up ship. Surprisingly it didn't take that long, it just was so intense that it seemed to last for hours instead of 30 minutes. After finally making it to the top Maya and Zero were rewarded with another one of Herbert's ECHOs.

'_Sounds of Scarlett snoring softely_'

'_Whispering'_ Herbert, "This concludes, "the sounds of Scarlett sleeping", tape number fourty-eight."

Captain Scarlett wakes up, "Hunhn. Somebody there?"

'_Whispering_' Herbert, "Oh crap…"

After grabbing the ECHO Maya and Zero headed left and crossed a metal bridge connecting the shipwreck and a rocky pillar with a junkyard on top. Once they came to it Maya saw that there were multiple objectives in this one place. The closest one was leaning up against a pile of junk, and was another one of Herbert's ECHOs.

"Today, Scarlett caught a crewmen stealing from her. She's so honorable – through my telescope I saw her give him a gun to defend him self. As she ran him through with her sword I knew – I knew! She's the one."

A bunch of spiderants populated the junkyard but Maya and Zero using singularity grenades shotguns and explosive rounds managed to stave them off and kill some of them. A little ways off to the right Maya found another scrap part, a broken turret engine and handed it to Zero who stuffed it in his pack.

After finding a relic that returned a portion of health on killing something, Maya found a way to cure herself of her injuries. Granted she had to kill the remaining spiderants; but it still made her feel a helluva lot better, and both her and Zero were happy for that.

After going right then taking a sharp left up a winding path they hugged the edge of the tip of another wrecked ship. After passing a weapons chest they found the last of Herbert's ECHOs mysteriously sitting on a chair.

"Okay, this is mix tame number two hundred six. I call this one, "Scarlett: I would like to touch you in places." [singing] Ohhh, SCARLETT –"

Maya shuts the tape off just as Captain Scarlett says over the ECHO, "Oh god, did you find one of his songs? Musical gonorrhea. Still you found all of his tapes better return them to him. And wash you hands afterwards."

Glad that was over, Maya and Zero take the trek back to Herbert's cabin, both of them lost in their own thoughts. Maya's thoughts: _Oh dear god, he's still with me. Why the hell hasn't he left yet? Why is he still here, stuck behind and getting slowed down by me? I know for a fact that he can go for days without sleep. I once stayed up for 4 days straight – so did he – and by the end of it he was wide-awake!_

Zero's thoughts: _She is a challenge, and one I'm willing to take, I crave when I win._

They eventually get back to Herbert's shack.

"You found the tapes? Once you deliver those with the last piece of the compass, Scarlett will have to take me back. The last compass piece is in that chest," Herbert says pointing to a chest.

Zero crouches in front of the chest and tries to open it with his hands.

"Ah – must be rusty. Rusty rusty. Just shoot the lock," Herbert says again.

Zero takes out a pistol and shoots the lock. It busts open, and he finds the compass piece … in pieces.

Maya stays silent as Herbert speaks, "Oh. You're shot destroyed the last piece of the legendary compass. Woops."


	12. Chapter 12: Dancing With Machines

**A/N: Just in case you missed the A/N last chapter, I will be updating Primed For Extinction Part 1 on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Eventually once I finish this story and start uploading PFE Part 2 - which will be Mr. Torgue's Campaign of Carnage - I will stick to the same schedule. The chapter length will vary, but rest assured aside from some of the more difficult missions, namely the invincible fights, I will be doing all the missions in the DLC.**

**Chapter 12: Dancing With Machines**

**Mission(s): Whoops * Main Mission**

**Catch A Ride, and Also Tetanus * Side Mission**

**I Know It When I See It * Side Mission**

**Don't Copy That Floppy * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty**

Herbert says, "Looks like when you shot the lock, you blasted the compass piece into bits. Ohhhkay, this is bad. Uhmm – no, wait! Ah! I can make a replacement! I just need parts! Just get to the Washburne Refinery, go go go!"

After getting the instructions from Herbert Maya and Zero go to the fast travel station, before they begin their traveling both of them stock up on ammo and their weapons. They fast travel to Wurmwater, and ship the parts to Scooter.

After that they jump in their Sandskiff and sail forward from the back of Captain Scarlett's ship, and out of the hidden cove. Zero turns left, since he's driving, and drives up the hilly sand flats past a pillar of rock and into the mouth of a canyon. After a short while they came upon the Washburne Refinery, a massive metal structure on very tall support beams setting it high above the sand flats. Closer to the ground and suspended above the sand flats is a pulley platform system.

Maya can tell that they only way to reach it would be to go through the small village connected to the system by a wooden boardwalk. As they sail right of the platform system, and through the legs of the refinery two enemy Sandskiffs come out of a hidden hole in the cliff.

Chasing them in a few circles among the legs of the refinery, Zero makes quick work of them using his own skiffs rockets. After that Zero sails along the canyon, but then makes a left u-turn and drives up into the middle of a small pirate camp. A few small pirates called Swabbies come rushing the Sandskiff, while a few pirates hang back and open fire.

Trying to keep their Sandskiff from exploding, Maya and Zero jump out role away and end up next to one of the houses. The pirates turn out to be 4 Powder Monkeys, and Maya ends up having to hastily dispose of the many grenades thrown their way. Zero shoots the kegs on their backs with one shot of his sniper rifle each.

They walk on to the boardwalk, and Maya pulls a lever activating the slow descent of the platform. As they hop on Maya's lust for loot leads her to spot a platform built halfway up one of the giant refinery supports. She thinks treasure chest and right before the platform was about to get close to stopping Maya jumps down and after a moment of adrenaline lands on the platform.

Maya finds a good Witch class mod for herself and a fantastic sniper class mod for Zero. After stashing the loot in her pack, Maya walks back to the platform system and takes a second platform up to the refinery. Zero stands there waiting Maya gives him the class mod, Zero dispenses of his old one and equips the new one.

Now with slightly better gear then before Maya and Zero head into the refinery. Right next to the entrance is a badass loader, Maya quickly phaselocks it and Zero shoots off one of its arms while Maya peppers it with corrosive damage.

As they enter the refinery Herbert says, "I can rebuild the last part of the compass, but I'll need some samples of poly-kryten. Once you get those, I can rebuild the key, and give it to Scarlett, and it'll help her find where the treasure is buried, and she'll marry me and we'll have a hundred babies and I'll never die. It'll be perfect."

Maya and Zero go farther into the refinery, and encounter JNK loaders, PWR loaders, and a few BUL loaders in the first room alone. Even Zero switches to a corrosive sniper to quickly deal with the multitude of enemies they'll be facing. Right before they can ascend a staircase at the far right side of the room, at the far left side a few EXP loaders jump down and rush the Vault Hunters.

The successive combined explosion of all three EXP loaders detonating at once due to the onslaught of corrosion from Maya and Zero reverberates through the refiner. It wakes up the rest of the loaders inside Washburne Refinery, and Zero senses that they'll have their work cut out for them.

Going up the staircase Maya finds the first piece of poly-kryten they need, she picks it up and puts it in her pack. Once they have it Herbert says, "Yes – just a few more pieces of poly-kryten. I've studied the lost treasure of the sands for months now; I'll rebuild the compass. For her."

After that Maya and Zero find themselves facing a loader. This one seems to be peaceful and doesn't attack them on sight. Once Maya initiates the conversation the robot introduces its self and gives them a mission.

"I am the Censorbot. All lewd behavior must be stopped. A deviant known as P3RV-E is in possession of sexually explicit materials. Please murder him, because morality."

After getting the mission from Censorbot, May and Zero head down a ram and into a place called the Arm. It extends in both left and right directions; to the left is a badass loader that is easily dealt with. To the left is a long hallway, and after walking quickly down it Maya and Zero turn to the right and head down another ramp. They come to a place called Workforce Fabrication Center.

Zero turns invisible and walks out in the middle of the chamber to assess the situation further. He finds that the door they need to open is closed, and won't open unless something on the other side opens it. Zero weaves among the enemies taking some out by stabbing their central processor with his katana.

Once all of the loaders are eliminated the door opens and another badass loader steps through. Zero silently takes off it's arms with two well placed sniper rounds, and Maya finishes it off by phaslocking it and melting it down with corrosion.

After weaving their way through a small corridor, they come to a place called the Forge Array. Right before entering the curved spacious hallway full of basins containing molten metal, and multiple ARR loaders among others, Zero finds another piece of polly-kryten.

"You know I bet Scarlett's getting' lonely. Yep – I'm pretty sure she regrets kicking me out to the Rustyard," Herbert says.

Immediately after Captain Scarlett says, "Nope."

After the comment from Herbert and Scarlett, Maya and Zero jump down into the Forge Array. The ARR loaders are a bit more of a pain to defeat since they have shields. A few hot loaders give them some trouble, but then Maya and Zero finally make it to a set of stairs at the end of the Forge Array.

After going up the stairs, Maya and Zero enter a room that branches left and right. To the right is a locked gate, with a switch next to it that doesn't seem to be working. Ahead of them sitting on a table, is the third piece of polly-kryten. After picking it up Herbert comes on the ECHO sharing a few words.

"You've almost got enough polly-kryten. Once I give you the last piece of the compass, you'll need to combine all 4 pieces and take them to the Magnys lighthouse. That is where you will find the burial place of the Lost Treasure of the Sands."

Maya and Zero head left, and turning left again come to a place called Lair of the Lecher-Bot. In the middle of the room is a pile of junk, surrounding that is a walkway. In the room are a few JNK loaders and P3VR-E. The robot is small and a singularity grenade takes care of it quickly.

Censorbot says, "Acceptable. Now collect the deviant's explicate contraband. It must be studied further."

Maya and Zero quickly collect the 5 stacks of nude magazines, Maya chuckles at the covers and Zero volunteers to have them put in his pack.

"You have struck a great blow to the perversion corrupting Pandora. Return to me for more work."

Zero, since he has the material in his pack volunteers to go back alone, but Maya simply refuses to leave his presence in such a hostile area. Both of them end up going back together, weaving their way through the piled robot corpses in battle zones.

"This filth is disgusting. I will determine the exact mathematical level of its disgustingness after further study," Censorbot says.

After turning the mission into C3n50r807 Maya and Zero quickly jog to the furthest place they had been in the refinery. Once they got there they went slower and cautiously. They pass through hallways strangely deserted, and only encounter one HOT loader before coming to an open area called Carbonslag Crater.

After jumping down into the area, Maya and Zero realize that they can't go back the way they came. To the left out of a door in the Crater come two badass loaders. After eliminating H3RL-E suddenly comes out of massive doors to the left. A giant robot colored blue, and with two massive guns for arms.

Hiding behind the dump truck Maya and Zero peek out and at first whittle down its shield with shock weapons. As soon as its shield is down, they switch to corrosive weapons and slowly but surely melt the giant robot down. They have to run for different cover once H3RL-E starts throwing explosive barrels at them. But the corrosive effect eventually builds up to such a high level that H3RL-E just explodes.

After that Maya and Zero walk up a set of metal stairs and into the refinery through a previously closed door. Greeting them is a red treasure chest, and Maya opens it finding a Nasty Root. Since it is way better then her current Torgue assault rifle she takes the new one and keeps the old one to be sold. Going forward more they climb a set of stairs and come to the last piece of polly-kryten they need.

Herbert says excitedly, "Greatgreatgreat! That's enough! Come back and I'll forge the replacement compass piece for you!"

Maya and Zero decide to continue onwards a little ways, they come to an open shaft and drop down into the arm. As they head to the end of it, Maya wanders back to C3n50r807 cubical, and reluctantly Zero follows. Maya talks to C3n50r807 and finds that it does have another mission for them.

"ECHO software piracy eats away at the moral fabric of society. Several sand pirates have bootlegged copies of the latest ECHO simulation program. Murder them and retrieve the ill-gotten goods."

After getting the mission Maya and Zero have fun racing through the last part of the refinery, Zero ends up making it to the door with Maya close behind. As they both step outside Maya checks the map and sees that their objective is relatively close by. A deep rumbling gave way to a tremor it shook the refinery slightly.

Captain Scarlett makes a comment, "Oh! The Leviathan knows we're close to finding the treasure. Can't wait to kill him and avenge my Roscoe. God, Roscoe was so cute. Had this big ol' face you just wanted to squeeze, and – what are you jackasses looking at? Get back to work, swab something god damnit!"

Maya and Zero descend on a platform. After landing and heading right off the boardwalk they continue going straight into a narrow path. On either side the walls rise high above.

After traveling a short ways they come to a patch of sand flats, surrounding the sand flats are low but un-climbable rocky walls. They head across the sand flats, battling and beating several sand worms before crossing under a bridge and coming to a dead end. To their right nothing, but to their left they see a ladder that goes up to the area where they can access the bridge.

As they get within a few feet of the ladder, 3 sand pirates at the post pop up and start shooting at them. They're quickly eliminated and both Vault Hunters climb the ladder, and walk across the bridge. After traveling a little bit more, and coming over a slight incline Maya and Zero come upon a place called The Dish.

A giant satellite dish, with its stand being the ground itself creates a dip in the middle. Surrounded the half submerged satellite dish are a collection of sand pirate houses. As soon as Maya and Zero walk onto the dish itself, sand pirates poor out of the houses and on to the dish. Since it's a large area, Zero is able to pick off some from a distance. Any that get close are deal with by Maya, using a superior Jakobs Leather Bushwack.

As some of the pirates fall, out of their pockets drops floppy discs. After eliminate all the pirates brave enough to come out of the houses, Maya and Zero collect 5 floppy discs.

Censorbot says, "Well done. Pandora's moral fabric is intact. Return to me at once."

After C3n50r807's words Maya and Zero head back to the refinery via a walkway. Jumping down, they head back to the platform system and take a platform up. After entering the refinery they weave their way back through the hallways to C3n50r807 Cubical. Maya turns the floppy discs into C3n50r807.

"If only DRM could shoot the user in the face. A robot can dream."

After completing the second mission from C3n50r807 Maya and Zero take the fast travel station back to the Rustyards. Going from the fast travel station, Maya and Zero head to the platform system over the gap. After pulling the lever they wait until the platform reaches them, then they get one and Maya pulls the lever that brings the platform to the other side of the gap.

Realizing that it was once again late in the night, Maya and Zero rush all the way to Herbert's shack – completely ignoring the spider ants along the way. They find Herbert already out of his shack.

"You got the polly-kryten? Gimme!"

Maya and Zero hand him the four pieces of polly-kryten, and he turns his back to them and works.

"And this goes there…and tighten that…cut that down just a hair…aha!"

Herbert turns back around and presents Maya and Zero the last piece of the legendary compass.

"Here ya go the last piece of the compass!"

Maya takes it.

"Now give that to Scarlett, along with the tapes. And she'll love me again. And if she doesn't, I'll follow her, and I'll smell her, and I'll just make her love me! Ahaa!"

"You got the compass piece? Great. Now, give Herbert that little gift I gave you, and then come on back," Captain Scarlett says.

Maya takes the gift out of her pack and puts it on the ground at Herbert's feet. Zero hurriedly pulls Maya back away from Herbert.

Herbert says in amazement, "A Gift?! From SCARLETT?! I knew it! I KNEW she cared! AHAA!"

Herbert bends to grab the present, and it explodes sending Herbert apart into many fleshy bits.

Captain Scarlett says, "Oh sorry about that, Herbert. Oh – I forgot to mention you were carrying a rather large BOMB around with you, didn't I? Many apologies. Now just bring back that last compass piece, so we can find out where the treasure is buried."

Maya says, "Well I'm glad that pervert is gone." Zero silently agrees with her and they jump down to the platform system, take it back across the gap and use the fast travel station to go to Captain Scarlett's ship. As they turn in the mission Captain Scarlett says, "Herbert. [gaging noise]"


	13. Chapter 13: Zero Fantasizes About Maya

**A/N: Apologies, for uploading so late, but when Claptrap speaks I feel my brain cells committing suicide one by one. Claptrap's school btw. Also apologies for any grammar issues ... just blame claptrap, I always do.**

**Chapter 13: Zero's Fantasizes About Maya**

**Mission(s): Let There Be Light * Main Mission**

**Faster than the Speed of Love * Side Mission**

**Mission in a Bottle * Side Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty!**

"It's time to assemble the compass and find out where Captain Blade buried his treasure. This is my piece of the compass. Take it," Captain Scarlett says.

Maya takes the compass piece.

"Now combine it with the other three pieces you've collected on that table over there."

Zero places Herbert's piece, Sandman's Piece, Hyperion's piece, and Scarlett's piece all together on the table to the left of Scarlett.

"There it is, the Compass of the Sands. Please, grab it."

Zero, very gingerly grabs the compass and stores it in his pack.

"And now, we've treasure to find. Take the compass to Magnys Lighthouse."

Maya and Zero walk off then come to the bounty board.

"Hi, I'm Natalie and I love a man who can go very fast. Go drive your skiff around in circles very quickly. I find this sexually attractive."

After getting the mission from Natalie, Zero and Maya jump off the back of the ship and land on either side of their acid net green Sandskiff. Maya tells Zero to hold on a minute, and then attaches the afterburner relic to the Sandskiff's consol. Zero grins but Maya suddenly pales, Zero almost rushes over but Maya holds out her hand and points to her stomach.

Zero backs off, already knowing enough and recognizing the signs to know that Maya just had her period and was likely bleeding. So partly to complete the mission, and partly to escape as quick as possible to give Maya room to breath Zero took off in the Sandskiff. Maya briefly contacted Zero on the ECHO saying that it wasn't that bad, and she'd have the problem fixed in a few hours.

As Zero used the afterburner liberally, chasing glowing nodes in a circle through Wurmwater, he had thoughts about Maya. Serious thoughts, this had been the first time since arriving in this pirate-y adventure that he had thought about her in the regard he was thinking of her now. All respect of course, but Zero had been respecting Maya since the moment they meet on the train that crashed on Windshear Waste.

Thanks to Zero's training he was able to successfully drive in a circle very fast, all the while he fantasized – quite naughtily – about Maya and the many things he wished to do with her. But he knew since Maya just had her period, he would be set back from that possibility by a few weeks at least.

Zero drove back into the hidden cove, and successfully reached the last glowing checkpoint node. Natalie comes on and congratulates Zero, "You drove so very fast! Come back to me so I can tell you how great you are!"

Zero then climbed up the ladder into Scarlett's ship and went straight to the bounty board attempting to clean up his thoughts.

Natalie gives on last complement, "You are very good at driving fast, va-va-va-voom. I am sexually—you are attractive. To me. Thank you."

Maya finds Zero standing next to the bounty board, she approaches him and gives a smirk. "Why are you just standing there?" Zero since he feels lying to Maya would just upset her even more tells the truth…in a way. "I'm fantasizing / about you naked as marble / with wings of pure lust." Maya is speechless, and struggles for words, Zero curly gives Maya another on of his pervy but truthful Haikus. "Your skin intrigues me / I want to stroke it softly / without my gloves on."

"Okay Zero … let's focus on the mission shall we? And as much as I want to bang you right now, I really can't with my condition and all." Zero inside his helmet is disappointed, but it doesn't show on the outside. He just nods and leads Maya down to their Sandskiff. As they drive off Captain Scarlett shares a few words.

"Captain Blade built the Magnys Lighthouse a few years before he died. His notes say that if you take the compass to the top of the lighthouse, it will show you exactly where the treasure is buried…of course Blade's notes also had a lot to say about society being secretly run by sentient tacos. He kind of went off the rails near the end."

Zero takes the gunner position, and Maya sails the Sandskiff straight out from the back of Scarlett's ship. She sails in a straight line towards a place called Riptide Reef. After the two exits the Sandskiff, and climb a set of stairs embedded into a hill they come to a small collection of pirate houses, with a few pirates milling about in the open. Maya – stills secretly in pain – tosses a singularity grenade pulling some of the pirates together.

The grenade explodes injuring the pirates with shields and killing the ones without shields. Maya laughs evilly and pulls out a Sapping Sand Hawk. Zero's impressed, and he says to Maya that he'll take care of any stragglers that survive. Maya goes to town, completely wiping the pirates from existence with tones of electrical damage.

After that they move on, coming to a ladder Zero climbs it and comes to a switch. Flipping that switch activates a pulley system, which in turn raises the two wrecked Sandskiffs blocking their path. Maya joins Zero at the entrance to Magnys Lighthouse.

The first thing they find is a shack with a health vendor and an ammo vendor. After checking to make sure they have enough, Maya and Zero turn right and continue on to the lighthouse. They come to a narrow bridge extending to the otherwise isolated rock pillar that supports the lighthouse. Now that they're up close they see that there is an even bigger pillar supporting the pillar that supports the lighthouse. The lower pillar's top extends providing enough of an area for the pirates to have constructed a village.

The fight is tough and for most of the first part – fighting off anchormen, grogmasters, pirates, and rapscallions plus powder monkeys – Maya and Zero had to stay behind a half sunken Sandskiff on the pillar**. **As they just barely managed to stop two grogmasters from destroying their cover, Maya says, "How in the hell did this Sandskiff get up her in the first place?"

Once the considerable force of pirates abated, Maya and Zero move forward. They first raid the lower frontal section of the village, then finding a passageway off to the right they come upon the right section of the village. Pirates abound but in shockingly low numbers, it's still enough to give both Maya and Zero a run for their money. Eventually they manage to wipe out all the pirates that came out at them, and they continued on wards.

They walk forwards and as they're about to enter a mine, dug directly into the base of the second pillar of rock, Captain Scarlett comes on the ECHO saying a few words.

"If you reach the treasure before me – which you won't of course, but just in case – be careful of the Leviathan. It ate Rosco, as I may have already mentioned, and Blade's notes say it will die to protect the treasure chamber."

As Maya and Zero enter the mine, several stalkers begin flickering about. As they begin to disappear and reappear shooting their exploding tail spikes things get hectic. It becomes a little more difficult then expected, since Maya can't phaselock them while they are clocked.

As Zero discovers quite by accident, a singularity grenade still works. One by one the stalkers are eliminated, but Maya and Zero do loose some time since there are quite a few. After climbing a raised section of track, Maya jumps right onto a weird but wide sturdy spike that juts out from the rock. She then jumps up onto the rock shelf, and almost immediately gets attacked.

Zero comes up from behind Maya and jumps past her, slicing and dicing the tri-tailed stalkers into bits. Maya moves forward going with her sense, and after screaming "eureka!" she picks up another message in a bottle. After matching its location to her map Maya goes back and follows Zero up a ladder attached to the rock wall.

Maya and Zero turn right and come out of the cave-y structure and look down upon a concealed pirate village. After jumping down the two Vault Hunters prepare to face some pirates, but the town seems oddly quiet and empty. They veer a little to the right cross the village and go up a small set of stairs that connect to a wooden walkway.

Maya walks forward and flips a switch that will supposedly lower the elevator/platform. As soon as Maya does this however, pirates come running out of the houses in an ambush. However it turns to be ineffective, since the pirates have to come up one at a time to get on the wooden walkway. This gives Maya ample opportunity to phaselock them sending them flying off the edge. While Maya cools down her ability, Zero reaches to Maya's lower back and snatches the Sand Hawk. He uses his B0r skill and Bores through the enemies annihilating them. After eliminating all of them, the elevator arrives and Captain Scarlett comes on the ECHO.

"Hurry to the top of the lighthouse – the leviathan knows how close we are to finding the treasure, and sounds rather miffed. Pretty awesome, right?"

Maya and Zero both step onto the platform elevator, and Zero flips the lever. It's a bit of a long ride up to the top and Zero fantasizes again, but based on Maya's brooding thoughtful look she had on her face – Zero wisely keeps it to himself … for now.

Maya and Zero make it to the top and discover a hidden oasis of green growing on top of the pillar, thanks to a pool of water contained relatively in the middle. After walking across the entire expanse, encountering no one, Maya and Zero enter the base of the lighthouse. They both stand on the elevator, and Maya pulls the lever.

"You're at the top of the lighthouse? Lovely! Just find somewhere to place Blade's compass, and we'll find out exactly where the treasure is buried."

After reaching the top Zero has to climb a ladder, come to the round platform with a roof, walk around until Maya spots a place to place the compass until he stops fantasizing about her again. Zero walks up to the lighting device and places the compass in the right spot.

"Is it working, what's happening?" Captain Scarlett says frantically.

Maya jumps off the lighthouse and skillfully lands right on top of the x she was looking for. An ECHO conversation ensues between her and Zero, and ends with Maya assuring Zero that she was fine and that she just found the last message in a bottle. He decides to wait before really activating the compass.

Maya digs up the treasure and finding a nice grenade mod, listens in on Captain Blade's ECHO recording.

"I'm hiding the blasted treasure. It got my entire crew killed. But if you want to die looking for it? Have fun. This is Captain Blade – sighing off – for good."


	14. Last Chapter: Battle of the Leviathan

**A/N: I feel like I have to leave an A/N because this chapter's so short … also it's the last! I hope you enjoyed my retelling of the DLC Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty! Playing this DLC helped me get my Commando in the game up a couple levels, so it helped me.**

**For those of you curious about a sequel I will be doing another story called Primed for Extinction Part 2. It will be along the same format as this, however it also follows Mr. Torgue's Campaign of Carnage, the DLC! So that's awesome.**

**Thank you for reading my story, it's much shorter than my usual. Please leave a review it'll help me out a lot. Also if this chapter seems a bit rushed … eh. I really wanted to end this so I could move on to something different. When will I publish Part 2? I haven't decided yet, to tell you the truth it might not be next Monday. But I assure you once I've made my decision, I will stick to the schedule of uploading every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.**

**Chapter 14: Battle of the Leviathan**

**Mission(s): X Marks the Spot * Main Mission**

**DLC: Captain Scarlett and her Pirate's Booty!**

Captain Scarlett suddenly shouts, "You did it! It looks like the treasure's buried in Wurmwater! Ha HA! I'll meet you out there!"

Maya hears this over the ECHO and she walks back to the base of the lighthouse, next to the elevator waiting for Zero. Once Zero starts descending Captain Scarlett says something else.

"Top notch my friend! And don't worry – I still need your help getting past whatever traps that might be in the treasure chamber. I will not betray you until we find the treasure room."

Zero and Maya walk forward and as soon as they get near the pool, Scarlett's Pirate crew appears out of nowhere.

"Just kidding! It's honestly been a lot of fun, but this is where you die."

Now that they're reaching the end of their journey, and in light of Scarlett's betrayal Maya and Zero go on the warpath. Since they had taken down Pandora's dictator, taking down an obsessed pirate captain's henchmen should be no problem.

It turned out to be quite easy and once they were finished with the rabble, two lutenient showed up. Lutenient Hoffman and Lutenient White. Both of them had shields, quite a bit of health, and more then enough experience to be challenging kills. But Zero and Maya chewed through them like butter, they were both pumped up and ready to kill both Scarlett and the Leviathan – albeit Zero a lot more controlled and methodical then Maya.

Shade said with concern, "My friend are you alright? I here explosions coming from the lighthouse – is that you exploding? I see Captain Scarlett heading to some bright light in Wurmwater. I would go very, very fast beat her to the treasure and possibly shoot her multiple times."

Maya and Zero rush to the malfunctioning fast travel station, and transport themselves to the now deserted pirate ship. They hurriedly digistruct their Sandskiff and get inside.

Captain Scarlett says, "If it's any conciliation, I mean everything I said to you. You're an awesome warrior, a real stand up individual. But my men and I just reached the spot pointed out by the lighthouse so this is where I say – {great rumbling noise of the Leviathan}

Maya sits in the drivers seat, and Zero stands at the gunner position. They race towards the spot marked by the lighthouse. As they reach it Maya sees that the lighthouse is shining on a bare spot of sand flats. Driving directly on the spot, a deep rumbling within the ground occurs. A giant different looking sand worm pops out of the ground, this one massive, and swallows Maya, Zero plus the whole Sandskiff.

When Maya and Zero regain consciousness they find themselves in a fleshy passageway. Looking up among muscles they see a spinal cord stretching along the ceiling. Around their feet in various pools is some type of acid that steams and smells horrid.

They move forward down the fleshy passageway. As they pass a health and ammo vending machine they find themselves at the top of a slope in the passageway. They begin following it down, but soon loose traction and end up falling straight down into an open area. Captain Scarlett greets them.

"So, the bad news is, the Leviathan swallowed us. The good news is, it's taking us to the treasure room. But the best news is, you remember my pet Roscoe – I found him!"

In front of them across a pool of acid, and at the other end of the huge chamber constructed out of flesh and bone … is something straight out of the previous vault hunter's nightmares. Lilith, Brick, and Mordicai would've been horrified that the Rakk Hive would've had a child like ancestor, only Roscoe was a lot smaller, but just as ugly.

The only tricky part for Maya and Zero was the awful smell coming from the flesh acid and Roscoe himself. It turned out to be easy enough, once Maya aimed for the crit spots. In fact with her Sand Hawk, Maya was able to take down Roscoe pretty easily. Zero aimed his sniper rifle right at Captain Scarlett right as she dropped off Roscoe's dead corpse.

"You killed Roscoe! What a shame. Ah, well – discursion's the better part of running away. 'Till we meet again, Vault Hunter! Oh, damn, I dropped my pistol. Do me a favor, and don't grab it would you? Because that would be stealing and stealing is wrong."

Zero in the need of a lovely incendiary pistol grabbed it anyway.

Scarlett scolded him, "Ah, you stole it anyway. Shame on you. And, also well done."

Maya sounds pissed and she wants chase after Captain Scarlett, but Zero calmly reminds her that they still have a Leviathan to kill. They traversed around the pools of acid, and climbed up a fleshy slope. They came to a corridor much like the one they started out in. It had pools of acid along its bottom, but Maya and Zero while sprinting and carefully placing their footing were able to successfully avoid them.

Once they got far enough ahead, the Leviathan roared and spat them out onto a rocky ledge. It roared and slammed two gigantic blades in place of hands down on the rocky shelf they were standing on. Maya and Zero saw around them a massive cave, even huger than the Leviathan – but that did in no way detract from the Leviathan's enormous size.

Seeing no immediate way of killing it Maya begins to panic and she looks to Zero. He points to three blue sore like things on the Leviathan's hide. Maya brings out her Sand Hawk, but Zero shakes his head, Maya then realizes that the bullets travel too slowly.

Suddenly the sand flats they stand upon starts upchucking several sand worms, Maya finds a use for her Sand Hawk. As Maya desperately tries to stem the tide of sand worms, Zero uses the Incendiary Greed dropped by Captain Scarlett to shoot out one of the blue sores on the Leviathan. The behemoth suddenly roared and slammed its blades down on the rock platform; despite close proximity the power of the slams did help Maya take care of the sand worms.

Zero suddenly had an insane idea, but he knew if Maya were doing her part he would be able to pull it off. In a moment Zero placed a hologram of him self to distract the Leviathan, and then ran invisible and light-footed up the arm of the Leviathan. Unsheathing his katana while still invisible, Zero zeroed in on the blue scab. He then, with one mighty thrust plunged his sword hilt deep into the Leviathan's flesh.

The monstrosity roared again, and plunged the blue sand worm acting as its extendable head into the rock. It ripped a great chunk out and threw it up in the air. That didn't concern Zero, but then the rocks fell at a trajectory that would most definitely hit Maya stills struggling with the sand worms.

Maya suddenly spun around screaming, "WHY OH GOD WHY DID SHE HAVE TO END UP LIKE THAT? GAIGE DOESN'T DESERVE IT! NONE OF THEM DID!" Maya pulled out an E-tech sniper rifle from the golden pouch of her pack. Zero immediately began to get nervous since he was still on the Leviathan. Looking closer Zero recognized the weapon as the Longbow, and Zero knew two things. One) he had deeper feelings for the Siren than he originally planned 2) he knew she wouldn't survive much longer without his steady guidance. _She's still a challenge_, Zero thought.

Just then Zero got flipped forward by a jerk of the Leviathan, it landed him right next to Maya who stood their with completely blood lusted eyes, holding a still Longbow in her hands. She was breathing heavy, and after a moment Maya calmed down and looked at Zero. "That … was … so … awesome!"

Zero agreed and once he looked behind him he saw that all the sand worms were decomposing on the ground.

Shade congratulated them, "You did it! The lost treasure of the sands is yours my friend! They were amazing weren't they Lionel?"

"[Tape corrupted] I agree!" Lionel said.

Finally after a long, arduous journey Maya and Zero finally make it to the treasure chamber. They walk across a conveniently fallen Leviathan blade and came to a door that slid open into the rock. A great pyramid of Eridium rock lay in the center of the spacious chamber. At the top Maya spied at least 14 separate treasure chests, and they all looked rather stuffed with loot.

–

Orphan: So ended the story of how the vault hunters defeated the treacherous Captain Scarlett, and slew the Leviathan. And as the sun set on Pandora, the Vault Hunter's realized that while they'd found Captain Blade's armory the true treasure of the sands had been inside them all along the end. How was that?

Marcus: That wasn't half bad, good job. You know, I'm gonna need someone to tell these stories when I'm gone.

Orphan: I love you Marcus.

Marcus: That's weird.


End file.
